It gets better! - Empty Closets - A safe online community for gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgendered people coming out

unrareod · 30th Dec 2011, 10:54 AM

Hi everyone

I joined here a while ago but never participated. At the time I was going through some interesting changes. I have been with my partner now for over 5 years. I gave birth to our daughter in 2010. She is amazing and growing so fast! We are going to try for another this summer.

I guess I just wanted to post to tell you, it gets better! When I was younger I was depressed and felt like I had to hide who I was from everyone. I felt like no one understood me and I was afraid of having to live a lie my entire life. It turned out a lot of people knew and were waiting for me to come to them about it.

Now my entire family and all of my friends know. At work, those who I am friends with outside of work know as well as anyone I am friends with on facebook. I don't go around announcing it, but if anyone were to ask me, I would tell them.

My partner's family had a bit of a harder time dealing with it and we just recently began making connections with her sister and her family. (It's amazing how a baby brings people together).

Through my experience I have found that it is best to live life for what is best for me and those who don't like it get left behind. They are the ones missing out. I am extremely happy and thankful for the life I have today. I wish everyone the best of luck in their journey!

**Chip** · 30th Dec 2011, 12:46 PM

Hi, and thanks so much for sharing your experience. With all of the suicides among gay youth recently, I feel like it's really important for those of us who have found happiness to share what that means with those who are struggling.

I hope you'll stick around and continue to share about your experiences as time permits!

Robert · 30th Dec 2011, 12:55 PM

Congratulations on being fully out!

I'm glad your partners family seem to be slowly coming around.

How long have you been together?

But just because it got better for you, doesnt mean it will for everyone else. Sometimes it doesnt get better. Sometimes you get lynched and die when they find out. Sometimes it gets worse. Just thought I should point that out.

Welcome to the forum.

Noir · 30th Dec 2011, 01:55 PM

Thank you so much for sharing your story--I think that you just brought to light the kind of life I want to live. I've been fighting with my fears of the future after college trying to lock them out, mostly because I'm a lesbian who never wants to marry a man, but does want to have the experience of getting married as well as raising a child aside from adoption. It always seemed very difficult to do, but just hearing your story makes me think that it's more possible than I dared to hope. Thank you, very much! I wish you happiness in the future as well!

thecat06 · 30th Dec 2011, 02:03 PM

That's great, I'm glad that things are going so well for you now!! Thanks for sharing your story, it shows people that there is a light at the end of the tunnel.

silverhalo · 30th Dec 2011, 02:13 PM

Hey welcome to EC. Thanks for sharing your story it means a great deal.

Artemicion · 30th Dec 2011, 07:49 PM

Hey and welcome to EC.

Nazo · 30th Dec 2011, 08:19 PM

Heyo, welcome to EC!

JoshB · 30th Dec 2011, 08:28 PM

Hey there, welcome to EC!

Aeon Magus · 31st Dec 2011, 08:16 AM

Hello, Unrareod, and welcome to EC.

30th Dec 2011, 10:54 AM	#1
unrareod Newbie Regular Member Gender: Female Orientation: Lesbian Out Status: Out to my family and friends..most coworkers know Posts: 4 Join Date: Feb 2010	It gets better! Hi everyone I joined here a while ago but never participated. At the time I was going through some interesting changes. I have been with my partner now for over 5 years. I gave birth to our daughter in 2010. She is amazing and growing so fast! We are going to try for another this summer. I guess I just wanted to post to tell you, it gets better! When I was younger I was depressed and felt like I had to hide who I was from everyone. I felt like no one understood me and I was afraid of having to live a lie my entire life. It turned out a lot of people knew and were waiting for me to come to them about it. Now my entire family and all of my friends know. At work, those who I am friends with outside of work know as well as anyone I am friends with on facebook. I don't go around announcing it, but if anyone were to ask me, I would tell them. My partner's family had a bit of a harder time dealing with it and we just recently began making connections with her sister and her family. (It's amazing how a baby brings people together). Through my experience I have found that it is best to live life for what is best for me and those who don't like it get left behind. They are the ones missing out. I am extremely happy and thankful for the life I have today. I wish everyone the best of luck in their journey! __________________ "You and me together, we could do anything, Baby... You and me together, yes, yes..." ~DJM

30th Dec 2011, 12:46 PM	#2
Chip EC Advisor EC Admin Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: Out to everyone Location: northern CA Posts: 5,582 Join Date: May 2008	Re: It gets better! Hi, and thanks so much for sharing your experience. With all of the suicides among gay youth recently, I feel like it's really important for those of us who have found happiness to share what that means with those who are struggling. I hope you'll stick around and continue to share about your experiences as time permits!

30th Dec 2011, 12:55 PM	#3
Robert EC Addict Full Member Gender: Male ♂ Orientation: Gay Out Status: Some people Location: World Posts: 971 Join Date: Jun 2011	Re: It gets better! Congratulations on being fully out! I'm glad your partners family seem to be slowly coming around. How long have you been together? But just because it got better for you, doesnt mean it will for everyone else. Sometimes it doesnt get better. Sometimes you get lynched and die when they find out. Sometimes it gets worse. Just thought I should point that out. Welcome to the forum. __________________ "I am like a mirror that dares not be what nature made it, but feels obligated, always, to reflect what surrounds it." - Frederick II of Prussia. "England is a Prison" - Gerrard Winstanley

30th Dec 2011, 01:55 PM	#4
Noir EC Addict Full Member Gender: Female Orientation: Lesbian Out Status: A select few Location: Missing Age: 18 Posts: 361 Join Date: Aug 2011	Re: It gets better! Thank you so much for sharing your story--I think that you just brought to light the kind of life I want to live. I've been fighting with my fears of the future after college trying to lock them out, mostly because I'm a lesbian who never wants to marry a man, but does want to have the experience of getting married as well as raising a child aside from adoption. It always seemed very difficult to do, but just hearing your story makes me think that it's more possible than I dared to hope. Thank you, very much! I wish you happiness in the future as well! __________________ The opposite of love isn't hate--it's indifference.

30th Dec 2011, 02:03 PM	#5
thecat06 EC's Biggest LNJF and SNL fan!! Full Member Gender: Let's say Pangender! Orientation: Let's say gay!! Out Status: Out to parents, campus, and 75 friends on facebook Location: Central and Northern Ohio Age: 19 Posts: 2,504 Join Date: Jun 2011	Re: It gets better! That's great, I'm glad that things are going so well for you now!! Thanks for sharing your story, it shows people that there is a light at the end of the tunnel. __________________ So many years have passed, since I proclaimed my independence, my mission, my aim, and my vision, so secure, content to live each day like it's my last, it's wonderful to know, that I could be, something more than what I dreamed, far beyond what I could see -Dream Theater

30th Dec 2011, 02:13 PM	#6
silverhalo EC Addict Full Member Gender: Female Orientation: Lesbian Out Status: Quite a few Location: England, Age: 29 Posts: 3,166 Join Date: Dec 2008	Re: It gets better! Hey welcome to EC. Thanks for sharing your story it means a great deal.

30th Dec 2011, 07:49 PM	#7
Artemicion :D :D :D Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: Anyone who asks, but parents in denial. Location: Vancouver BC Canada Age: 23 Posts: 1,112 Join Date: Aug 2010	Re: It gets better! Hey and welcome to EC.

30th Dec 2011, 08:19 PM	#8
Nazo Janis Ian's Lesbian Crush Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: Facebook, not hiding at college Location: Michigan Age: 19 Posts: 2,071 Join Date: Dec 2010	Re: It gets better! Heyo, welcome to EC! __________________ are you feeling like a prisoner are you living life the way you want giving time to ones you love are you giving time to who you are

30th Dec 2011, 08:28 PM	#9
JoshB Future Surgeon Regular Member Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: Ask, I Tell. Location: New York Posts: 34 Join Date: Dec 2010	Re: It gets better! Hey there, welcome to EC! __________________ Pre-Med; Graduates from HS in 2012.

31st Dec 2011, 08:16 AM	#10
Aeon Magus EC's Blue Gaylien Full Member Gender: I go peepee standing up xD Orientation: I'm a Man's Man Out Status: The people that I care about most. Location: South Africa Posts: 2,262 Join Date: Nov 2011	Re: It gets better! Hello, Unrareod, and welcome to EC. __________________ Sing me a Painting, I'll paint you a Song Inside my heart is breaking. My make-up may be flaking, but my smile still stays on. The show must go on.