Hi, Just realized something... I am not gay for sexual physical forfilment. Sexual physical forfilment can be achieved 100 different ways. Being gay is a means of seeking personal spiritual and emotional forfilment and the physical aspect is simply a means to an end. If I wanted to get to Hawaii I could take boat or plane. The boat or plane itself is really unrelated to the goal of the destination. Being gay has nothing to do with sex in my analysis, and everything to do with spiritual and emotional forfilment. That makes homophobia all the more stupid for me.
Excellent observation! I think that's why it is such an issue with us. It is so much a part of our being to be LGBT. If we put it in perspective here - being heterosexual includes all aspects of being heterosexual, including but limited to the hetero sexual experience. How true it is that we are wired the same way but with an attraction to the same sex. It is inclusive in our very being. BTW, now that I am out I absolutely love being a lesbian. I never thought it would be this way! It does emcompass me in all aspects.
You're definitely right -- though I wouldn't say it has nothing to do with sex... after all, I want to have sex with a guy, not a woman. :icon_bigg But your main point is excellent, and something I tried to explain to people, including my wife when she proposed staying married and me just doing guy sex on the side. I was already having sex with guys while we were married. But I want and need more than the sex, I want/need to be fully true to who I am, and that means a true authentic soulful and fulfilling emotional relationship with a guy - the sex is an expression of that relationship.
I can second everything that everyone has said. Relationships are about, well, relationship. Yes, sex is an important part for sure, but being gay is not simply about sleeping with someone of the same gender. I have had absolutely no success getting that point across to my husband. He thinks I'm "leaving him" to "sleep with someone else." And Biotech--I'm right there with you. I love being a lesbian. I feel like myself for perhaps the first time in my life. --Zoe
I concur completely. It is an obvious demonstration of misunderstanding and disrespect of what same-sex attraction is all about when it is suggested that it is only the satisfaction of sexual release, or some sexual fantasy that needs to be experienced (and for a long time I thought that's all it was for me). Taken that way, it's just masturbation with someone else!
I don't fully agree that the sex is not important, it is, but your point about the emotional connection is the most important part.
Hi, Sex is only a means to an end, not a total definition of a person. I assume that many seek emotional and spiritual forfilment in a monogamous relationship. Sexual preference is a variable in attaining the goal but is not a goal in itself.
I agree while sex is not the only thing it is a important thing. Being gay to me is sum and total of who I am now. Not just the sexual side. I love being gay, I love being out and having come to terms with me.