Finding a Therapist

This is just my opinion. I would call prideline in your area to see if they have any recommendations for therapist. I would also look up your State's professional license regulation and weed out any therapists that might have some serious boundary issues which you can generally tell by how many times they have been disciplined and for what. I prefer cognitive behavioral therapy myself. If you want to get started on learning some of the principles of this therapy from self help prospective I recommend the feeling good handbook.by David Burns. As for deciding gender of therapist how about writing down the pros and cons of each and that may make your decision z little easier. I hope this helps! (*hug*)

 

In real estate, it's "location, location, location."

In therapy, it's "chemistry, chemistry, chemistry."

By this, I mean you have to feel comfortable with the practitioner, though therapy itself may not be comfortable. BTDT. It's not "rent-a-friend." As for GLBT issues, their ability to be empathetic is a must. I can't give an opinion as to whether it needs to be their entire practice, but certainly a part of it.

Good luck with this. Put together the suggestions you receive here, and string together the common elements.

 

I know this might make you even more overwhelmed...but there MIGHT be therapy options available to you now in your area. Supposedly there are therapists with sliding scales that actually are affordable. There might be something else, like colleges that teach future therapists sometimes have low cost therapy available to give their students practice. (I think there would be a lot of oversight from true, qualified therapists here.)

It's worth considering, at least.

---------- Post added 5th Aug 2013 at 02:47 PM ----------

I remember this book was strongly recommended by the last counselor I saw. Indeed, he was insistent that I do one last session with him, partly to get the book title. (I quit due to the cost of his services. Frankly, I think he could have skipped that last session, and just spent five extra minutes in the previous session to give me the book title. But that's another story.)

I think I did read the book. I can't remember how much help it was, however. I hate to say this...but by that point, I was so burned out by the experience that I put less value on the book than some might. (I got burned out because the whole experience ran hundreds of dollars, out of my pocket, and I saw little improvement in my life...)

 

I think the most important thing is finding a therapist that you feel comfortable with. I don't think you will gain anything from sessions if you don't feel completely comfortable with your therapist. When I saw a therapist, I asked a zillion questions at first. It was sort of like I interviewed her, to see if we could work well together. If I didn't feel as if she would have been one I could be totally honest with, I would have kept searching. Best wishes to you!

 

I can say, for sure, a male, gay therapist. If you're not as comfortable around men, having a male therapist IS the way you will become comfortable, really.

If you were going to some exotic locale, would you want someone who has just read about the place or someone who has been there, many times, and who has lived it? (yes, gay, male therapist!)

How to find one....

My insurance has a doc finder -- and for mental health you can pick areas of specialization -- sexuality, LGBT, etc.

I also checked the web site of the nearby universities -- they had lists of LGBT therapists in the area.

and then I checked their own profiles at the APA and on their own websites. I narrowed it down to 3 guys, started calling, and the one that "clicked" with me on the phone is the guy i went with. And he's been great.

All the best.

 

Congrats SimpleMan on finding a therapist. FYI, this website offers a directory of LGBT resources, including gay friendly therapists: Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual Transgender Near Me.

Also, a used Amazon Kindle is a great, inexpensive way to download Velvet Rage and other books without worrying about someone seeing an actual book lying around. Just be sure not to use a shared Amazon account. If you don't have a credit card you can use on Amazon, you can buy Amazon gift cards at many places. They're in the big grocery stores in my area. Best of luck to you.

 

Thank you Spaceman! I'm on my way to the grocery store right now. What a brilliant idea! So many books I've been wanting to read and thinking I'd have to wait until we split all finances and he was no longer getting notifications for each and every one of my charges. Thank you!!!

 

Thanks! Spaceman & Db- You reminded me I need a new kindle! Have not read a book in so long! (!)(!)(!)(!)(!)
There was this one book I read last year that was a series.....:icon_redf

 

My therapist has half of her clients as lgbt folks as she listed lgbt issues as one of her main focuses. In my unprofessional opinion, I would say find a woman therapist because what matters a great deal is who you are comfortable with and can feel free to talk about anything without holding back. That is what matters in the big picture. The gender of the therapist doesn't matter, only who you feel is right for you. If that means a woman, then that's who you should seek out.

Also you might be able to begin therapy before you have a job. A lot of therapists will work with you on the financial aspect and write off some expenses under financial hardship.

Also don't worry about all those approaches. Maybe you see a few therapists and choose the one you feel most comfortable with to see regularly. They will worry about what approach to use with you and if in time you feel like trying someone different, then you can do so.

 

You're braver than I am! Wow, that's a really big step. I buy all my lgbt books online and hide them so no one happens to find them...

 

Another resource to find therapists that are familiar with LGBT issues is gaylesta.org

Sounds like you are on the right track already. Best of luck!