I'm 30 and trying to figure out my sexuality. I'm pretty sure I'm bisexual but feel that I need more time to explore those feelings before labeling myself. I do have a few gay friends (two males friends near by, one gay brother in Europe, and a lesbian friend near by), but we don't hang out a lot. When there was a gay bar near by, I would sometimes go there with one of my gay guy friends, and my lesbian friend, but that was before I started questioning my sexuality. We always had a lot of fun, but all the gay bars have now closed that are near by, and I would have to go down to Denver to the big clubs. 1. I'm not ready for that. 2. As much as I love my gay friend, I'm not sure I would want to go down there with him. I'm just not ready for everything I would experience with him. (I can't go anywhere with my lesbian friend, because she is the one I was exploring my sexuality with) 3. I wouldn't pick up a guy in a bar, so why would I pick up a girl in a bar? I really have no idea where to meet woman, or how to get involved with the LGBT community in general. I thought about going down to Boulder, but I still don't know what to do once I get there. I tried going to a LGBT church last weekend, and to be fair I'm so shy I didn't really talk to anyone and left as soon at it was over, but everyone there was much older than I. I'm too old for college groups, too young for the church I found, too straight to feel okay going to a gay club in Denver by myself, too gay to want to date a guy. I need help! I did meet a pretty hot guy last week and almost asked him out to coffee, but I just couldn't. I want to explore this other part of myself before I get involved with a guy again. Does anyone have any suggestions as to how I can get involved, where to meet people, or how to solidify what I am feeling? Thanks.
You might try looking up meetup.com for LGBT groups. Some places have book clubs, exercise groups, and other things that are specifically for the LGBT community. How much is out there depends on where you live. I think this is what I would try if I was ready to get out there. My situation is a little different (I'm married with kids) so I don't have the freedom to explore that yet. Someday though... I can relate to being shy. It's hard meeting new people.
That's a good idea Lindsey. I had looked into that before and didn't find much, but looked again today. There still isn't a lot in my area, but more down in Denver. I just don't get down there a lot. Also many of them are for things I am not interested in, or not good at. But I did joint two Meetups so we'll see how that goes. I just hope I can actually get myself to go. I know I will never meet anyone (man or woman) sitting alone at home, but it is so much easier than being around people. I might email my brother also and asked him for ideas. He use to live in Boulder so maybe he can give me some ideas of good hang outs. Too bad you are in California, I would make you come with me and you could tell your husband you were going to support a friend.
I don't know how far you are from Denver but it could be worth the drive to meet people who are like you. That's a lot better than feeling isolated. Also don't be afraid to try things you aren't interested in, you might be surprised and find out you like something that's entirely new. I've had that experience. I wish I could go with you but....that drive is a bit too far for me.
