openly gay

I'm not openly gay, but in the country I live in, same-sex marriage is allowed and so is co-adoption. Although there's still a stigma of seeing a man with a man or a woman with a woman, folks here recognize that everyone should be happy the way they are, despite a bit of prejudice that still exists. Co-adoption is a different matter, people don't know how and if that situation has a negative outcoming for the children, but in the due time we'll see how that turns out.

 

I am married (same sex) and I feel most everyone treats me well and has no issue, but I do live in a historically liberal area. It is going to depend on where you live and your family dynamics. Someone in a highly conservative family and geographic location will likely have a different experience.

 

It's weird. I basically consider my to be "openly gay" because I am out to my entire family, will admit it to anyone who asks and will offer it in any "context appropriate" situation. However, I am not out at work though I very much want to be. You see, in a professional environment like the one I work in, all matters of sex, sexual orientation, sexuality, sexual preference (I hate that term), sexual identity as well as race, age, marital status, ability/disability status, religion, political affiliation, etc., etc. are strictly off-limits in professional discussions and are generally avoided even in personal discussions. So, while I have been eagerly awaiting the first "context appropriate" opportunity to reveal the fact that I am gay to my co-workers, I have been waiting a long time and could easily be waiting much longer.

The reason I say it's weird is that nothing has changed. I don't generally look or act according to the stereotypes so people who don't know me, I guess, just assume I'm straight (or gay). In a strange way it's actually kind of frustrating! I even contemplated getting a tattoo so people would know (or ask). I will say however, that, while it's been a long time since I gave a damn what other people thought of me, I care now even less about concealing some of my mild flamboyant mannerisms. After all, who cares if people think I'm gay? I AM!

 

It's awesome.

I have friends across the spectrum. I have straight friends and gay friends, businessman friends and punk rocker friends and semi-pro athlete friends. They know. They're fine with it. And although I've never stopped to check, I'm sure the people in THEIR lives - their c-workers, their bandmates, their teammates - probably know as well. And maybe some of them disapprove of my sexuality. It wouldn't surprise me - the odds alone say there's gotta be some homophobes in close proximity. But again, I don't know. Or care.

Given all that, consider this thought.

"I would gladly trade being able to be myself completely around those closest to me, AND their unconditional approval on who I really am...for the feeling that I'm not being judged on my known sexuality by somebody I don't even know."

...not much of a trade, is it?

Lex

 

I'm pretty open and it's perfectly fine. With a couple of exceptions my entire family knows and has met my partner. My boss and co-workers all know and have met my partner (I routinely talk about what we're going to be doing or have done in terms of movies, trips, shopping, home improvements, etc.). All of our friends know and many have only known us as a couple.

I've been out since about two weeks from the day I figure out I was gay (at 21). Never had any regrets about it.

Todd

 

I'm recently openly gay, and I'm fast learning it depends on the area you're in. I'm a truck driver so I'm in a different state almost everyday. Some places I feel amazing being myself, and others I feel very awkward. I'm trying to not let it affect me no matter where I'm at. I'm new to not hiding myself though.

I don't talk different or anything, just wear makeup and "accessorize" now I guess would be the best way to put it haha.

 

I'm not hiding myself anymore, although I've been kind of easing into being myself rather than switching overnight..

Most people treat me exactly the same, although actually i think they feel more comfortable about some things now that they know im gay.. like 'oh its ok to talk about that with a gay guy' or sharing emotions etc

 

Feels great! Just being your true self. If you ever want to see gay life in action, come visit San Francisco and walk around the Castro. It's like gay Disneyland. Rainbow flags everywhere, men holding hands with other men, women kissing women, gay couples pushing baby strollers, Drag queens carrying Latte's from Starbuck's on their way to their Yoga class, LGBT filmfestivals, 1.5 million people at gay pride, it is really something to experience.

But gay life happens in small towns in Colorado and Kentucky too. You just have to look a little harder. Maybe it is the out couple that owns the local bistro. Or the gay music teacher that is super cool. Being out to me is about finally being able to relax in my own skin. My straight friend paid me a great compliment over the weeken as we were drinking coffee in the Castro and watching two naked guys walk by with only a shiny sock over their penis. He said, "thanks for being a cool gay guy" I really appreciate our friendship." Well, I don't know how to be a "cool" gay guy, but I suspect it has something to do with being out and being ok with yourself. ;-)

 

Being openly gay where I live is hell. Some people are SO close minded the would even spread rumors about you and stare at you in the streets they are SO rude. Yesterday for example there was a bunch of gays and lesbians protesting about Putin's politics on homosexuality, and they weren't disturbing anyone, they weren't even shouting, they were only taking pictures with a banner saying "love always wins" and the whole cafeteria was staring at them, whispering stuff like "omg are they gay?" "omg did they just kiss?" .... I hate this place=.=