Would i be considered out of the closet if my parent's and close cousins know? But my grandparents who are also close to me i haven't got the guts to tell yet. and theres other family members who i don't feel very close to but got the feeling that scents they been around most my life in my childhood sometimes. that i should allow them to know as well because it feels correct? and the rest well they can find out but maybe not because knowing me i could end up in eather relastionship if you think about it. Though theres a chance i would more like to be with a girl but hey fate will tell me someday. But i still wonder sometimes is this considered out of the closet or inside the closet? I kinda am unsure if i am or not at times because i just don't know. :icon_sad:
Well, I'd call you partially out of the closet, and well on the way there. I'm in pretty much the same boat. I wouldn't call yourself completely out, but not completely in either. There's a spectrum of these things At the same time, why does it matter? Except on here, there's no box to check saying "yep, I'm out!" that I know of, and even the one here lets you put whatever you like in it (look at mine, for example).
Coming out is a lifelong process. You'll never be "done" with it, since with every new person you meet, you're back to that question of whether or not to disclose. As for all the people you currently know, it's another place of choice. For some of them it may be important that they know and for others....not so much.
To me "being in the closet" means actively hiding something about yourself and not wanting others to find out...in this case, your sexuality. Being out is the opposite...not hiding it, because you don't care who knows. So you are not in the closet to your parents and cousins. But it sounds like you are to many others. But it's ok. Personally I would not obsess over labels like "closeted" any more than I would obsess over labels like "gay" vs. "bisexual" vs. "heteroflexible homoromantic". I agree with orman that coming out can be lifelong. I'm not sure I agree that you're closeted the moment you meet someone, unless you tell them. I'm good at math, which frankly can be stigmatizing in a woman...when I meet someone new, I don't immediately tell them "Hi, I'm Annika, nice to meet you! I'm bisexual and I'm good at math!" Am I closeted about either of these things? Now if either topic came up in conversation and I lied or avoided a "straight" answer (so to speak) or changed the topic...*that* to me is when the closet doors close around me. Otherwise, it's not a closet...it's just something (one of many things) they don't yet know about you.
