Some of you may remember my desperate, desperate cries for help. The depth of sorrow was simply unbearable, and I've endured some misery in my day that, I know, many of you can relate to. Well, things have changed in the last few weeks, and I thought I should share them, not only for those who offered so much advice, support and love to me, but for those who find themselves in the same despair, things can truly get better. In summary, I came out to my wife and kids last December, divorce was final in June. I then entered the darkest time of my life thinking that I was doomed to be alone, that I missed all my good years and that there was little point in living. EC really did buoy me through that. I reluctantly responded to an online ad and met a very nice guy. No fireworks or anything, but it felt great to be with someone in a romantic manner. I made a friend. That gave me the courage to make a profile on a well known dating site, but "just to look around." Welll I stumbled upon a guy who seemed too perfect to be true. WAY too good for me (how's that self-esteem?). I sent him a message to which he replied! I couldn't believe it. We met for a quick lunch. I then asked him out again, and he said yes AGAIN! We went out last night and it was totally surreal for me. Now, it's way too soon to know how this will go, but the fact that a great guy was interested in me that I'M interested in blows me away. Oh, the best part? I got a good-night kiss. Too much, just too much! There is hope after all. I would've never believed it.
So happy for you, Runnerrunner!! Keep us updated on this match of yours! Pssst: I remember my first "guy" kiss a few years ago, so I know EXACTLY what you're talking about!
Oh, the best part? I got a good-night kiss. Too much, just too much! There is hope after all. I would've never believed it. Nice to see that it is "getting better" for you. I have never kissed a man; I don't even know what to expect it to feel like, so I couldn't be disappointed. Maybe surprised, if he made the first move.
Runner, I have seen your struggle through the past few months...I couldn't be happier for you! It's so wonderful to find someone special isn't it? And to feel that it's so right, for the very first time! May you finally find peace and happiness!
Thanks for update and it goes to show at any age there people out there. Whether it becomes a fall on relationship is hard to tell but your self esteem is going to be much improved. I guess the old phrase "it does get better" holds true.
Wonderful! Thanks for sharing your good news with us. It made me very happy to read it. Keep on keeping on! Milan
Well RunnerRunner it's great to hear that things have turned up for you. Interesting isn't it how one small step can lead into something bigger..
That's really sweet! Made me smile I can only hope everything goes SWIMMINGLY good for you in future! Bravo
Runnerrunner . I'm proud of you! And happy for you! Your an inspiration! Hugs Rose(!) (Yes I'm a lesbian who loves the dancing banana!)
I second Episode's sentiments, especially regarding the word "swimmingly". I don't know you, but I'm very happy for you and I hope your road continues to be a smooth and amazing one. Yay for meeting an awesome guy!! :thewave:
For those in the throws of "what to do!? The coming out process at this age can be long and very difficult. But, I'm very glad I did. Every day I regret my past life in the closet a little less. The healing process from such self-denial is hard but worth it. Updates: The guy I saw a few times wasn't quite right. Very nice, but we didn't really "mesh." I met a few other guys (4+), all very nice, but still not quite right. I've realized I have a terrible trait of morphing into what I think the other guy wants me to be. THAT'S not cool. This is probably a left over from time in the closet. BUT, I've met a great guy that I'm really excited about. Still early, but I'm pretty excited. AND, I came out to my boss. That was a significant step because I was very worried about my job. I live in a very conservative place. Anyway, it was a delightful experience and ultimately made a close friend through the process. I didn't see that coming! Regardless of what happens with the new guy this is all major progress. I was in absolute despair and would have never expected that my life could change so much. The pain was worth it. Thank you again to all of you that encouraged me through my most horrific days. I love you all.
I can't help myself, I just have to steal a line from Rose... (!) (!) (!) (!) (!) (!) (!) (!) (!) (!) (!) And here's one of my own, So glad to hear it's all going well for you. Thanks very much for this awesome post Runner. I'm sure you can still remember how much reading these positive experiences help buoy those of us that are still deep in the thick of those 'horrific days', maybe wondering if it wouldn't just be better, easier to continue a life of denial. It's great to get that affirmation that life really can be better outside the closet!
So happy for you Runner! Your post made my day as I'm the same age and in similar circumstances, but only out to my wife for a few weeks. So I'm working hard not to give in to regret and despair as I deal with the fallout and look toward the future. What a boost to hear a story like yours. Thanks and continued good luck to you.
You are doing so well. And the morphing... You are also learning fast!! Keep posting! It gives old sausages like me hope.
