Ever since I have acknowledged my lesbian side, I've been in fantasy land. Now I know this is normal, but I have seem to have lost interest in my old hobbies and I want to learn anything/everything about lbgt stuff. There's no way I can leave my marriage at the moment - I used to be a dietician and lost my job because I was not able to concentrate. I have my own clients that I work with but I have actually chosen to not work them. My job is pretty demanding and I need to be on top of things (research/networking/expos etc). I used to breath nutrition, now I don't really care - and when you work with sick people you need to care - I used to care a lot =( I feel like spending time do anything but being in my fantasy land is of no interest right now, including losing my feelings for men. I feel kind of obsessed...when will I go back to normal?
I'm sorry guys, I just really need advice - I feel like I don't want to be around my kids anymore and a teenager that wants to go wild... I'm losing my clients and I got my period (sorry if tmi) and I was like "crap, I am really a woman" =(
This happened to me when i first came first said I was bi curious I started thinking about girls more and more and wanting to be with them not only sexually but emotionally too and when i labeled myself as bi and accepted that I liked women I started to have zero attraction to men and just only women I walk outside and only look at the women I saw and think wow she's hot and i could date her but with guys I felt nothing I no longer wanted to be with guys either . I still thought i was bi because I thought it would come back but years past and still to this day I have not had a crush on a man . It might be different for you so don't worry about it or it could be like mine I don't know but that's how it was for me
Hi stocking, Thanks for your answer. It just seems really confusing for me, I feel like I latch onto almost every woman that speaks to me and I feel like I'm falling in love with them. And when I'm not thinking about this my feelings for men come back. I always feel like kissing my husband but when I do I feel like I'm gonna throw up. I'm trying not to suppress these feelings but I just find it really annoying that I fall in love with all my girlfriends, like literally, I can see my whole life with any of them. Am i just lonely? Can you relate to this?
I have been getting attached to some women that I wasn't interested in before so i can relate to this a little I don't fall in love with my girlfriends but I grow attracted to random women i see or meet I think wow she could be my girlfriend . I don't feel any of this for men though I can only relate to this a little i'm very lonely myself . There was one friend though that told me about their sexually and i wouldn't mind if she wanted to make out with me it's just i want a woman's touch so bad . that I'll almost take it from anyone .
Hi, you said that you felt kind of obsessed. Have you experienced it earlier? I am sure there are techniques to cope, but I am not familiar with them. It just seems to me that what you are feeling to the others is not real love. You would not fell for everyone. Even if you find some girl right now to date, I don't think it will bring happiness to her. Because your feelings are what they are.
Hey Nick, I'm not even sure how to explain how I feel. Ever since I was 12, I have always had this need to get extra close with my friends, I basically become a cling on. And every time I speak to a girl and connect with her, I can't get her off my mind and think about her 24/7...and I pretty much connect with anyone. I actually have a really long story about my obsessions/life in general. I used to see an OCD specialist for the past 2.5 years and we recently came to the conclusion together that my thoughts are not obsessions, so now I am booked into to see a gender/sexuality specialist. I have been with women before, but at that time I was more into men. My fear is that I will need to leave my marriage in order to figure things out. Btw, I have been thinking about what you said about no ignoring my kids. I'm really glad you said that, I needed to hear that from an outside source.
(*hug*) I hope you will figure it out. You kids are the constant in your life. It's usually you who is there for them, perhaps this time they will be "the engine" that will help you get out of the troubles.
Thanks Nick =) I had a great day today, no over excitement and I was able to spend a relaxing day with them. It was really good. I hope I have more days like today =)
I'm not sure if this will be of any help, but I think I've been dealing with something similar. Since my divorce, I fall easily for any guy who even asks me for the time. I was with a guy for about a month until I realized that I was in no place to be in a relationship. I needed to take a step back and let my gay dust settle to figure out just what I wanted from my new life. That and I have kids who deserve my attention. I was too scattered to do them any good. On top of that I'm ready to quit my job and find something else to do. It's ridiculous. It's like I'm starting from scratch in every aspect of my life, but in reality I'm not. So, to stem the tide of frantic behavior I've decided on a year moratorium on any big decisions. I've signed a year lease on my apt, and just signed a new contract at work. I've cancelled my online dating profile and and trying (desperately) to just learn to live and just be me - whoever the hell that is. I do enjoy, very much, looking at cute guys on the street and pondering the possibilities of whether he'd be the "one." Because, after all, all the cute ones are gay. What I'm finding with this research is that I don't even know what "type" I'm into. Lately it's the tougher, burly guy with a beard. I've never even considered that type before. So, moral of the story is that I'm on pause until I figure "me" out. I have a feeling that this will take a while.
@runnerrunner, that's great. I think I shall do the same, funny thing though is that when I do relax my feelings for men return and it confuses the crap out of me. I think if I do decide to leave my marriage and explore this side of mine, I will have to do it just the way you are - getting to know me 1st. I think your type will come as you get to know yourself more - so far seems like my type is anyone who talks to me, haha.
I'm not very experienced, but it seems like you might not get this off your mind until you actually ARE with a woman again. Just my guess. Then, you might not be so obsessed...it might be because you feel trapped where you are in life right now. ??
Hi Thebiword, I'm not too sure what I'm supposed to do here. I've slowly been getting back into my job as I cannot afford to be without work and I'm spending time with my kids. I'm just really scared of when those thoughts take over again. I've made a promise to myself that I will not neglect my job or my kids. I'm really confused and feel all over the place sometimes. I just keep getting these thoughts to shave my head and go be a lesbian.
Wow you sound like me the lesbians thoughts never stopped . Instead of suppressing the thoughts why don't you explore them , they might help you figure out what you really want and what your missing if you keep pushing them away they'll just keep getting worse and worse . Trust me I know I suppressed a lot of these thoughts and it got so bad I even started dreaming about women and wanting to sleep with them . How would you deal with it if you don't take it head on and just keep ignoring it will just pile up til you can't take it anymore .
