Tonight I went out to a game night with some new friends from the gay men's chorus...there were 13 of us...guess who was not one of a couple...everyone was lovely and welcoming...had a wonderful time...it broke up around 10...so in my infinite wisdom I decided I'd go to the bar I go to for a night cap maybe see a friend or two...it was "Bear Night"...it was loud, crowded...I immediately regretted stopping in, but I ran into one or two people and decided to stay a while...I wanted to be wanted in the worst way...just plain horny...I wanted to be couple, if only for an evening...no forethought...as some of you know bears are kind of my thing...I for all intents and purposes threw myself at the first friendly face I saw...someone I met some weeks ago...only to understand very quickly my coloring was all wrong...I'm quite fair you see, and chocolate was the preference...I felt like such an ass, but soldiered on, until I realised how unattractive desperation is made the rounds and said good night to those who are friends...3 or 4...and left...home in bed whining on line...again...how could I have been so stupid as to have: 1. been such a slut, 2. been blind to what in hindesight should have been obvious, 3. been willing to so quickly to give up my principles for what Truman Capote once said amounted to nothing more than a sneeze...anyhow...how do you handle this?:***:
Tim, You live and learn. I was in a bar focused on who I was with and more than one guy came up and pointed out we had not moved from our spot on the couch all night. Unless I know somebody I am pretty reserved in a bar. If I am with somebody I know... I guess that is my advice; know people first. Tom
Tscott Don't punish yourself. You surely wouldn't have asked for advice if you did meet someone you really liked, which is not impossible. I suppose we have to explore at times rather than just sitting at home feeling sorry for ourselves. Love
