Well, after 2 years of being home with the kids, I've decided to start working again and getting out and talking to people - and not obsess relentlessly about my sexuality. When I'm out and busy it seems like I feel like more of "myself". My feelings for my husband (and other men) have returned - with a vengeance, I may add. My free time is fantasizing about making love to my husband (or another attractive man) all day long...this is weird. I still think about making out with every woman I come in contact with, but the thought seems so empty. I still want to cling to my girlfriends but when it comes down to sex, I'm all about guys. I've never fantasized about making love with a woman...I could never get off per say. When I was with a woman before, I would have these thoughts to make out with her, touch her, etc. But it was "empty" when I did it. I really, really loved her, but making love was boring. I just kept wishing she was a man. But the emotions with a man are not as intense as with a woman - almost like I'm homoromantic-heterosexual. Not sure where to go from here...guess I'm just going to ride the wave...
Thanks! I honestly feel so much better and like I've come out of storm or something. I'm right back into work and interacting with my kids again and wanting to be close to my husband again. You were right when you said in one of your posts how powerful the mind is!
