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Boyfriend Update

Discussion in 'LGBT Later in Life' started by MAXWELL45, Mar 19, 2014.

  1. MAXWELL45

    Regular Member

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    I had another date with my boyfriend and made it a point to have a serious in depth conversation about us, our relationship, future, and needs. It was a good date easily.

    I took him some place comfortable and private for this conversation and made it a strong point to be respectful to his comforts in how I said things.

    I told him that I have come to a clear conclusion that I am not bisexual. I am gay. As much as I find women physically attractive and comfortable to be around, I have no sexual desires to be with them. I am sure of this. My sexual attractions and wants are strictly for older men only. Of all the possible partners I could have, older men are the only ones I am sexually thinking or feeling for. I can not see myself with anyone other than an older gay man.

    Secondly, given my boyfriend is an older gay guy and I do find him attractive, physically and emotionally, I told him I wanted to be with him as his partner in life. Sexually, physically, emotionally, relationship as a couple. I am in love with him on all levels and want that love to be committed into a relationship between us and us only. I do not cheat and I do not play games. I want to give him my true heart and want his true heart. Question to him, can you give me your true heart. He says yes, He’s sure of it.

    Next, I told him that I am horny. Why am I going to lie about this. I am horny and need sex. He should know so there is no games between us. I told him that when he is ready, I want him and me to make love to each other. As I am not experience is sex with men, I want us to make love my first time and him to take the lead. When he is ready. He was very comfortable and understanding of this. So happy he is. He said he is ready for us to go to that level and he has been wanting to make love to me for a while. I did not know he felt this way and wish I knew sooner. He says he has no std’s and is open minded about sex. Okay, so we have not actual time frame to make love with each other, but we are clearly working towards something soon.

    Lastly, he shared his points with me. He admitted that he has a bad history with men. He has a slight problem with being controlling. Not abusive, but controlling. He admitted that he is insecure so he tends to take control so he doesn’t risk loosing his man. I understand this and at this point, I am okay with it. He can be the leader in our relationship as I am very inexperienced. However, I made it clear that if abuse come into play, I am gone. No one abuses me, even if I allow him to control me. And if I ever say ‘no’, damn to hell, it’s no and stop!

    He also told me he does really love me beyond just physical attractions so he knows he can be committed to me and me only. No one else between us, unless we both agree to invite someone in. Again, I am okay with this and like his thinking.

    He and I shared other thoughts, but these are the key ones and so far, I feel better now with him. I want to be with him. His partner and boyfriend. Who he shares a life with and enjoys life with. I need to feel comfortable with him and him with me so this conversation was a good thing. I think him and I have a great future ahead of us as a gay couple. I really do love him. Plus, he is a damn good kisser! No shitting. The man can kiss like a lover. (*hug*)(*hug*)(*hug*)Can all older men kiss this good? :eusa_danc:eusa_danc:eusa_danc Wow.
     
  2. ornoir29

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    Sounds like you've found a very nice man! Wish the best to you both :slight_smile:

    (and yes, my boyfriend is older and his kisses are mind-blowing)
     
  3. MAXWELL45

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    [ older guys rock!!! ]
     
  4. setnyx

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    i am so happy for you! loving each other on every level, wow that's awesome! gotta admit though jealous as heck, of course for me it would be a woman.LOL
     
  5. deejay

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    Bisexual ASIAN - LOST & LONELY in Dubai
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    WOW! I feel very very happy for you. And like setnyx, I do ENVY you, A LOT!!! Such relationships like this nowadays are very rare... Way to GO!!! Congrats!!! =)

    I hope I would found "THE ONE" for me as well... Pray for me!!! =)
     
  6. PatrickUK

    Advisor Full Member

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    Very good luck. Hope it all works out well for you. In my opinion, being in a committed relationship beats the pants off hook ups and short flings. They are hard work and you do have ups and downs, but it's worth it to have that really intimate connection with a special person.