It occurred to me that before the past few months where depression and anxiety pretty much told me I need to come out, I never even considered it before. Didn't debate it in my mind, never even considered the possibility. Never once in the previous 4 decades of my life (even when I had a bf in high school) did I ever even think about the possibility. I wonder if this is a sign of the times or did you all seriously think about it earlier in your lives?
I considered it and discarded it as a possibility as early as 13 and finally took the plunge over 20 years ago at 22. But I had definitely considered it for a long time first--wish I would have done it earlier.
I came out to a few people at 14, but not to the majority until my 20's. I think people come out whenever they are ready, but I have noticed that closeted people have more emotional problems due to it being a secret. It takes a huge load off your shoulders.
I didn't consider coming out before , but now I am thinking seriously about it . Life is too short to spent in the closet .
I have thought of coming out off and on during the last year. Well, I have come out to many people, but no one who actually knows me in day to day life in the real world, as dreary a place as that is. But...I'm not sure I really have anyone to come out to. At this point, I'm not sure I really want to announce the news to everyone I meet, even for a brief second. I think I'd be inclined to come out only to people who are close to me, but there really isn't anyone left in my life who is close. :tears: Past this, there are a few people in my life who are not likely to be accepting of LGBT people, and who could cause practical problems. One of my stronger job references might evaporate, for example. I am hoping that by the end of this year I'll have myself positioned where most of these people are out of my active life. But I think I probably said that last year, too. Although, in a way, I'm not sure I really am "in the closet." I am as far as the less accepting people. But I don't really care as much as I once did with others. If I talk about LGBT issues, and someone assumes I'm gay, I don't care.
I understand I've mostly come out more or less to most immediate members of my family and friends. I have been feeling better as a result but strangely enough have a hard time with my family mainly because I don't feel accepted. I feel though and have realized over time I need to be "out" more. Last year I fell hard for this girl and had the hardest time admitting my feelings for her partially because I was so afraid how I'd be judged and she was with someone already. I realize though, I need to do what makes me happy and I do need to be honest about who I am whether people accept it or not.
At 53, I have not thought about it until this last month. I realize that I have been so closeted that I was not even able to contemplate the possibility. My real hang-up or area of hold out is my connection to the Christian church. There are parts of the Christian experience that I still treasure, there are other parts I have long discarded. I realize that that I have felt "homeless" when it comes to a faith community for a very long time. This is part of my closetedness. The EC community has been more of a spiritual community for me in the last three weeks than I have received in the last 14 years in my local church experiences.
ive only just realised that im a lesbian really and have only told my friend not telling family for a while yet
Coming out? I didn't even know that I was in, until this year! I wish I had, then life may well have been different.
I considered it for... about a week. Once I figured out my sexuality, I got right to thinking about coming out. Right then, I only came out to friends, not family. I came out to my parents a few months later, after encouragement from friends.
It was a turning point moment for me as well. I've counseled a lot of gay teens recently who are struggling with the issue of coming out. When I was a teen coming out was not an option unless you wanted a life of hell but many kids today do have a choice in the matter and it's often a major source of anxiety for them as they debate their options. I find that very ironic and rather sad actually.
When I was in college I was totally in love with a female friend of mine. I wasn't really sure if she might return the feelings or not, I had some reasons to believe she might, but others to think she didn't. But the situation became very complicated. Coincidentally, she had a close friend from high school come out as lesbian. Her parents forbade her from hanging out with that girl, and they nearly kicked her out of the house just for wanting to stay friends with her. In the end she stopped seeing that girl at all. So for awhile, yes, I had considered telling my friend about my feelings and outing myself, but when that all happened it put a major roadblock in the way. At the time I didn't really have a fully formed concept of my sexuality, all I knew was I liked *her* and didn't really know what that meant in the bigger picture. But eventually I got over her, and somehow I buried those feelings for girls, or did my best to ignore or explain them away until recently.
