I don't want to associate with straight people anymore

I can see how it would be frustrating to always be in the sexual minority, not quite relating to experiences that heterosexuals often have. It can become easy to feel alienated when the majority of people's conversations revolves around their heterosexuality and you have nothing to contribute.

But I'd like to think that as humans we are more than our sexualities. Who we are attracted to is just one aspect of who we are as a person. Yes, in some cases there won't be common ground but what about everything else? As soon as the topics of relationships and dating are over with the subject shifts to other things like interests, values, life events.

Seeing as straight people make up the majority I don't think it would be fair to completely cut them out of your life. You may come to find that the straight people you get to know have as many things in common to you as the queer people that you want to spend more time with.

 

I can totally relate...just because queer people are so friggin' awesome!

 

Yeah. It feels like all the straight people are dog persons while I'm a cat person. I wanna talk about cats and how amazing they are but they only talk about dogs. Moreover they automatically assume I'm a dog person too and constantly ask me if I had a dog, or tell me that I should've had a dog already, ...and it's really annoying.
There are a few people who know that I have a dog allergy and that I love cats but even among them I sometimes don't feel like I'm fully understood.

 

I have friends I have told who I am and I like spending time with them.The ones that don't know I'm not so great with. I am actively seeking company of gay people now. I think what you are feeling is normal. I have accepted who I am and want to be with others that accept and understand me. When I told my husband I was bisexual he said I still love you but I don't understand it. That says it all really. He turned on me a month later. I don't think anyone understands unless they are LGBT or different from the so called norm in some way.

 

I can understand why this mentality is appealing, but it isn't for me. I see cocky behavior and divisive cliques in the LGBT community as well, especially in regards to "true" homosexuality, or perceptions of bisexuals. One of the most horrifyingly ignorant things I ever heard came from a man, who identified as homosexual. By his comment, you could have stereotyped him as being part of the Ku Klux Klan. While I can forgive stupidity on behalf of a heterosexual individual (in general, there is a limit), because it tends to be due to upbringing or just ignorance. I'm a little more harsh when it comes to the non-heterosexual individuals, because they should realize, we need a unified front and support.

 

Most people are sheep. They act and do as they think society tells them they ought. They dont manage to ever think about anything, least off in a Greek love andlythong goes way. They are so petrified of having to face the animal in themselves, that.they will be annoying to gay and queer folks, just to hurt others and to reinforce their straight thinking. Rather than discuss sexuality they would rather be violent ...
Gah, im starting to spout rubbish here..sorry. (been drinking to relieve myself front torment of knowing I will never have what I want.. And that I have totally.blown.it eight best mate, who I have loved a long time, I said what I have felt for decades and had the door shut in my face. Never had that before as have always refrained from speaking myind about these things, only recently accepting myself for me.
On and on I go, sorry for witterong hee.
Oh yes, so I think basically two things.. Well three...
Ignore all their crap.
Be true and honest, give people time, but dont let them walk all over you
Remember, they will all be scared as hell
And you will have lost patience with them all, and now decided that you have to move on, for your own preservation.
I have recently lost my best friend and the guy I wanted .. Hellup
Im daft, should have sorted this out years ago



Better late than never.
Big curve ball this was, knocked me off my feet for a time..

I dont feel comfortable, but never have, and im just stuck in limbo again, difference is i now totally recognise that rather than ignore.
Sorry for wasting your time and space with my posts.

I would advise a nice drink, smoke and a nap.

 

I felt that way for a while when I first came out and to be honest I had several years in my twenties where I honestly hardly even interacted with or knew any straight people--the wonders of gay neighborhoods in large cities. I got over it--and, frankly, the way I got over it was I stopped assuming straight people had a problem with it and I found, much to my surprise, that most of the straight people around me really didn't care. Just my experience, take it for what you will...

 

I like my straight friends, but I would like a few more gay/bi friends, too.

 

Hmmm...dost thou recognize irony when thou spyest it?

 

I just call it like it is... err, I mean... thou does indeed.

 

I only have about 4 straight friends left. All of the new friends I have made have been gay. They are so much more fun to be with and it is nice to have somebody else to talk or text to that understands what you're feeling.

I feel kind of bad for my old friends though. They haven't really seen very much of me lately. I used to do a lot more with them because they were the only friends I had. This post has reminded me that I still need my straight friends because they were there for me when I had problems and needed someone to share things with. I just couldn't share my sexuality issues with them because they didn't know I was gay.

 

I'm ambivalent on this. So what else is new?

GLB who are not catty, cliquish, and carry too much anger make for cool friends. Straights who don't give a shit about whether someone is GLB make for cool friends. To date, I do not know any transgender folks, hence the GLB.

 

I wish I didn't have to either, but all the gay people in here want sex. Not even a bit of chatting.

 

99% of my friends are hetero, and honestly, I like it that way.

I'm the one who's different and special. My male friends want to be like me because all of my female friends adore me.

 

Yes! I can totally relate.

In my case, it feels more like a sense of urgency because this is happening at such a late phase of my life. I just turned 50 and am feeling a lot of grief for all the lost time.

I've been hanging out with a lot of lesbians lately and the more I do, the more I feel like this is my tribe. I always used to feel like I was on the periphery, a tourist. But now that I've committed myself to this, I wonder what the hell took me so long.

I wish I could invent a time machine and go back and tell my 25-year-old self that liking the Indigo Girls is NOT like liking Stevie Wonder. Even though liking one does not make me a blind Black man, liking the other most probably makes me a queer woman. *shakes my younger self by the shoulders* Pay attention! Notice the signs!

Anyway, my advice is... be selfish. Hang out with whomever you want to hang out with. You've been the good girl and the dutiful mom long enough. You will never get this present moment back. Seize it.

That's what I'm doing - making the most of every present moment that I can.

 

I feel the same way
I almost don't even want to hang out with my best friends anymore because all they talk about is there crushes on boys or how "oh he is sooooooooooo hawt" and stuff like that, if I could join in on The conversation but with girls then I would but they have a think against LGBT+...then again they are the only friends I have

 

It sounds like you're not really accepting who you are yet if you feel like you have to deny the straight world exists in order to feel good about your own sexuality...

Granted, I'm not out yet myself. I do feel like I want to spend more time with LGBT people, I like being on this forum because I feel like people here get what I'm going through and there's a sense of camaraderie in shared feelings and experience. When I do come out, I will probably try to seek groups in the real world, too. But being queer isn't the only thing about me. I'm also an artist, I'm a geek, I love animals, and taking walks in the woods, and so on. All of those things are part of me just as much as liking women is. For me, I have straight friends that are interested in some of the same things I am, and that's what we talk about most of the time. We're geeky and artsy and like to talk movies, animation, and things like that. And because we're friends if they do talk about a crush, or their husband, from time to time I am interested because I want to know how their lives are going. I can see how it would get tiresome if that was ALL they ever talked about, though, and if that's the case with your friends, what was it that you found you had in common with them in the first place that drew you guys together? Maybe you can work on rekindling that, instead of writing them off entirely? Being more open about your sexuality (when you're ready) might help, too. Because then when they talk about crushes you don't have to feel uncomfortable and hold back if you want to talk about a same sex crush, yourself.

 

I'd say about 90% of my friends are straight and I like it like that too. Looking at a lot of the comments here, maybe it's a generational thing? My mates, my straight male friends, have never excluded me from their conversations about sex and relationships.