I am so ready to give up on this

(*hug*)Unfortunately I think you have just stumbled upon some not very nice people. There are good people out there don't give up. Just because people are lesbians doesn't mean we will necessarily get on. Just like dating men we have to find the person we connect with. That often means being treated badly by people before we find the right one. I haven't started this dating game yet and reading all these stories is scaring me. However don't give up on the good people they are out there.

 

About the fb status, you haven't met this lady yet she is probably in the dating scene, she like you is looking for love I wouldn't discount her yet, if she liked you she will make you the one and only, and who's to say what she said was even referred to a date, she could be talk on about her mom for all you know.

Chill, there is someone for everyone in the mean time be kind to yourself and appreciate you.

 

Have you heard the expression the "dating game"? Well, dating is a bit of a game of chance and when you lose it's hard as it involves your feelings and emotions. You can, of course, decide not to play the game again and never subject yourself to the pain of loss, but you'll also never experience the joy of winning either.

It sounds like you experienced two painful losses , but that doesn't mean you should give up altogether and dismiss the possibility of dating anyone. Don't let two utter bitches cloud your opinion of all lesbians.

I totally get that you are hurting... I've had my fingers burnt playing this game in the past, but try to take something from those experiences and be more cautious next time around. Don't give your heart away easily and be sure about what you want and what you expect.

My late Grandmother once told my cousin that you have to spend some time separating the "wheat from the chaff" when you are dating. Never a truer saying. In your case, you've got rid of some useless chaff.

 

Your story reminds me that Bjork song

"I'm so impatient, I can't stand the wait
When will I get my cuddle? Who are you?
I know by now that you'll arrive
By the time I, I stop waiting, I miss you

Björk - I Miss You"

Funny thing those words are so true for me.

Still sorry for your struggle to find love. Hope you find someone to call your own soon.

(*hug*)

 

I wouldnt give up but I wouldnt be as focused on a relationship.

As someone who has done a LOT of online dating (not women) I can tell you there are good and bad out there, but people have a propensity to misrepresent themselves grossly online. Its tempting, I think, because some people seem to think "oh if they just meet me they will love me" and its just not always the case.

"Then the one locally, the one I chose because I bet that she wouldn't reject me. "

Choose women based on who they are, not whether or not they will reject you.

One of the dating mantras that sticks out to me is "Be who you are looking for"

 

Men. Women. Just people, some good, some bad, some downright dangerous. You just haven't found the right one yet, and, in my experience, that comes when you're not seeking, only browsing, for someone who might be good enough for you instead of the other way round.
Sorry you've met the bad ones, and that you're so alone.
I wish you happiness that comes soon.

 

This. Is. Bullshit. What is wrong with those women?! Should I even call them women? They sound like a bunch of little girls to me! Don't give up.. But definitely keep your guard up at all times.. Only let someone in if you KNOW they wont disappoint you.

Sorry you're having a tough time.. Things will get better x

 

People, in general, are cruel. To add to that, we live in a society where dispensability is encouraged. I feel your pain. I really do. BTDT. There are hazards in dealing with qualities seemingly specific to men and there are hazards in dealing with qualities seemingly specific to women, regardless of their sexual preferences. Why do you think some people swear by pets? And, then, there aren't even enough people around to make homes for these impounded pets who need potential owners. But, I'm on a tangent now, so, back on track, it's just people. If you need to take a hiatus for your self preservation, do that instead of pursuing situations which might disappoint you. Also, consider engaging in activities which interest you and where sexual identity isn't even an issue. In those cases, all sorts of people show up and they generally wouldn't care about sexual orientation, especially out west. That could be a decent tide over for a while. Who knows.

 

Don't give up the perfect person could be around the corner. If you ever need to chat message me

 

BTDT = been there, done that.

 

anaisninja:

Hi. I certainly understand how you feel, having tried and struck out with several women over the past few months. And, having had my heart badly broken by one.

I just wanted to give you some encouragement to keep looking. The thing that I have found in going to women's events and dating online is that even though I haven't met the one, I have met a lot of really nice women, including three with whom I have become friends. Knowing that at least I am meeting other people like me, who understand what I am going through, makes the dating game tolerable.

And, who knows, one of my new friends might have a really cute lesbian friend who might just be the one.

Good luck!

 

I think maybe those two couldn't handle your wonderfulness. It was too intense, all at once. So, group activities where people can share it around and become used to it will be better. You're probably going to have to beat them off with a stick so be prepared.

 

Better they dip off now, than later on, when things were a tad more serious, and you needed them.

I would have put something a little longer and elaborate, but... damn it... all these folks beat me to it. LOL.

 

I'm glad you recognize that the best route is to meet real people in real situations and see where those relationships lead. I think that's the best way to go about it. Being friends first and lovers second certainly worked for my husband and I.

I can't help but think that you'll feel better once you have your own place and your own life. Living in someone elses house after your separation would have left you feeling somewhat in limbo - and that's going to come across in your interactions with others.