I'm emotionally exhausted. All I seem to be doing is taking care of everyone else. I'm at my parents house and they are so stressed because of my separation that I end up feeling guilty. I feel like I should go home instead of burdening them with my issues. My children are being awful to each other so need constant supervision and are too much for my parents to deal with at the monent. the eldest is horrible to me and the youngest won't let me out of his sight. i feel guilty because i know it's the separation that is causing these problems. My ex is treating me terribly one day and apologises the next. I haven't got anything left to give and I've only just started the divorce proceedings. I'm too tired for this stuff now. I hardly sleep and have too much work to catch up on. I'm done. I need to rest.
If you need to rest, then do so. Take time for yourself, maybe go away for a week-end if you can arrange it? I understand what you mean, I feel like I give and give and I'm exhausted now. Don't feel guilty about the separation, or your children or your ex. The children will adjust and don't let them get away with their behavior because you feel guilty, that will make it more difficult in the future. As for your ex, I understand, mine was the same way. He'd be horrible one day and then apologize the next. It does eventually get better, it did for me anyways. He's also grieving the relationship you had and what he thought your future would be, but that doesn't mean he can treat you poorly. If mine is being like that, I stop talking to him. You're not responsible for how he's feeling or how he deals with this, and don't deserve to be treated poorly for being who you are. Finally, you have no reason to feel guilty, this is who you are and resulted in the situation you are in. Be proud instead, find a way to have time to yourself and come up with a plan of how you can proceed.
Seriously: I think rest - or rather quality sleep - is the most important thing …:sleep:... without that everything feels shaky. Try your doctor if you need some short term help with sleep. Maybe allow your parents to worry a bit. It is natural and it shows they love you. (*hug*)
At least he apologizes the next day...I really feel for you, though. This is not going to be an easy time, but it has to happen, right? - so take extra good care of yourself, I know that is often said, but really do it. (*hug*)
Same boat here Mel, lean on us. You should contact HGL IN BIRMINGHAM I've got there number it's totally confidential and will arrange for therapy round your area. It's a god send message me if you want the number or just google nhs healthy gay life birmingham x
You're in my thoughts as transitions like this are very tough. This may sound weird but some of what you are feeling is grief. Old lifestyles and patterns have passed and new ones are beginning. Be kind to yourself.
