Hi, I am new here. I am so lost on all this sexually identity stuff that it’s unreal. I am 42 yr old guy, pending a divorce from my wife and wow... Lost. My marriage failed because we eventually went in different directions in life after years, not because of my sexual uncertainty. Sex issues with my pending ex wife where never an issue. We had a great sex life. Now I am here. Confused, lost, no friends or family support, and scared to let people in my personal life know about any of this. People in my personal life are very judgmental and back and white in thinking. The last thing I need is meanness or judgment so I never talk about my personal matters to those in my personal life. I am not sure if I am gay or bi, but know I am not straight. I have constant sexual dreams about men and women both and to be honest, I enjoy the sexual dreams. I also find some women and some guys physically attractive. No clue to any of this and that is why I am here. So, I babbled on too much when I get nervous. This is just me right now. Thanks.
Hey Welcome to EC. Well, i think you have taken the first step, coming out to yourself. That's already a great thing, and certainly not easy to do.
Welcome to EC, I think you'll find some people here going through some quite similar things. Have you spoken with a therapist about this? I've found that quite helpful.
Welcome. I too was concerned about people being mean or judgemental. I can honestly say you're in the right place to avoid that nonsense. Please take care of yourself as you are going through a lot right now and please do see a therapist. No you're not crazy, you just need someone who is trained to listen and is totally confidential. Look forward to hearing more from you.
Welcome! You'll find a lot of nice people here that will listen and try and help you. Being able to know that there are others that are in similar positions has helped me feel better.
Hi, welcome to the EC. I know how you feel at the moment I class myself as Bi but I've never been with a woman so who knows! I have gained lots of support here and after a lot of therapy I am beginning to realise it doesn't really matter. If I can find someone I want to be with I won't be letting any narrow minded people get in my way. Happiness is difficult enough to find without any other issues getting in the way. This is my thinking but that doesn't mean I'm not scared of friends and family accepting me. I am! I have already lost a few along the way but with time I have accepted its not me that is the bad person! Whatever you decide it's fine and don't let anyone tell you different. Good luck and feel free to talk anytime you need a shoulder. (*hug*)
When they find out, some people will be thinking you have "changed course" in mid-life, when all you have done is finally understand yourself and what it all means better. Whatever you are, you have always been, whether you realized it or not. When your divorce is final, you will be free to explore your emotions with other people without having to accept criticism from those people you are now concerned about if you don't want to. This is a good place to start talking about what you are feeling right now if you are so inclined. Welcome to EC.
Thanks for the words of support and wisdom. This is going to be a challenging journey of discovery I am going to need in person support for. Hope I can get it.(&&&)
