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Sleepless in the hills of WV... wanting him

Discussion in 'LGBT Later in Life' started by quietman702, Sep 23, 2014.

  1. quietman702

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    All but family
    As some of you know I recently met a guy that has changed my world view that lives ten hours away. I've been pretty much sleepless since I got home a few weeks ago. Thought it was my meds but while loading the dishwasher just now it dawned on me... I want to be there with him... not here! My thoughts a racing... dumb, lustful, stupid, needing, yearning... it would never work... hell he's never even said he likes you but has invited you back. My mind races on and on.

    I am still logical enough to realize that it may be the freedom I desire, possibly he's just the manifestation of my desire? I retreated from divorce a month or so ago as wanted to try an open relationship... but have to wonder if that's really good for me or my wife.

    Thanks for hearing my ramblings. :tantrum:
     
  2. jnr183

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    Do you have a sense that he feels the same way? Or have you had this conversation? Would you consider moving to him?

    I know all that's a little down the road, but I am constantly worrying that - based on numbers- the right guy is going to be hard to find. And, unfortunately, your right guy may very well not be in West Virginia.

    That being said I think only you would know if you are really attracted to HIM or just someone like him. I guess consider whether you think the solution (being with him) is realistic and worth pursuing and then asking him how he feels!

    Good luck!!
     
  3. nerdbrain

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    I am curious about your situation with your wife. It seems like you're pretty clearly gay-identified now. What's the rationale for remaining in the marriage?
     
  4. bottomsup

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    I cant let go, well, I can, but I cant. She is a big support for me at the moment, and untill i get more support and into a stable head state, ill stich here unless it blows up.
    Catch 22 of course, ain't gonna find that other support untill i leave..
    Well, freedom is in the mind, if can live together and be free, and friends, then why not?
    Just causes confusion from being so close under one roof i guess!

    ---------- Post added 23rd Sep 2014 at 07:30 PM ----------

    off to some supper groups for me I think!
     
  5. quietman702

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    Jnr183: I really don't know what he feels at this time. His wife died once year ago so he's finding his way too. It may be that I'm attracted to the freedom. I can be cautious beyond belief... thus why it took me forever to come out.

    Nerdbrain: the rationale for staying married is that when I came out to her she said "Please don't leave me alone". So I'm trying to honor that as she is able to move around etc. but disabled with no income. Sometimes I feel if I just left I'd be a nasty bad word... other times I feel screw it... let her figure it out.

    Bottomsup: I have some of the same feelings and we've been friends since I was 18. She told me the other day that we are still best friends... quietly admitting that we are no longer a couple.
     
  6. Aliraza05

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    hi Brother, breath dude breath :slight_smile: You are awesome!!! So proud of you for 11 weeks no alcohol! It's difficult when you see someone who you want to be with and have no idea if they're even gay... that's why I said breath lol. May I suggest that you just say hi to him and see where it goes from there. You're a beautiful guy, just be yourself. Who knows he may not deserve you.
     
  7. bottomsup

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    Credits to you quietman for sticking with her, it sounds like she needs you and its honurable that you look after her