Well I met with my lesbian friend today... to talk about my situation... and to do this I had to come out to her! I knew that she would be understanding as she went through the same situation with her now ex husband over 10 years ago. That was probably the hardest thing I have ever done! but it felt good in a weird sort of way. First, to hear those words come out of my mouth! it took me what seemed like forever to finally say it... but I did! I said 'I think I am.... no I know am... long long long pause... gay! WOW! I thought I would feel more relief... but I do feel better not being the only one who knows! I guess that's a relief... but now I have to continue on my journey of telling my wife... My friend suggests writing a letter... then either reading it to her, or letting her read it... and go from there... that way I can say everything i need to, and not forget parts... because of nerves... This is the hardest thing I have ever done in my life!
Hey clovis, Great feeling huh? I wish you the best of luck and good courage for the challenge ahead! The more you come out, the easier it gets, and the better you feel. This is not an absolute guarantee, of course, but it happens much more often than not: it does get better!
Amazing progress! Writing your thoughts down and reading them out or sending them is very therapeutic.
Very wonderful job! The first step is always the hardest, and you've pushed past that. You're amazing and you should be proud of yourself!
I am not so certain that this is the hardest, telling your wife is going to be harder. I think however you were given good advice when your friend told you to write a letter. You can take your time doing this and think long and hard about what you actually want to say to her. Congratulations however on taking the first big BIG step of coming out to yourself and telling someone else. Well done you will find a new freedom in yourself because of that.
Clovis that is great you have started your journey of coming out ! I am also starting my journy I have told 3 people so far we thats not true 3 here where I live and everybody here on EC knows now!! lol I wish you all the best of luck and please keep going and if you ever need a shoulder to cry on or just want to talk I would be honered to be that peroson ! so have a great day and take care
Got any asexual friends? We are generally pretty darn accepting (90% of asexuals support gay marriage) of people coming out as gay, queer, lesbian, etc. so if you need more practice or whatever maybe you could come out to them first.
YAYYYYY! I'm proud of you as you are brave and courageous! I really like the letter idea, not only will you give it to her but when you have it for those times of self doubt that may come. Congratulations!.
So fantastic! How did she react, by the way? Was she surprised? I'm always fascinate by encounters like this (both my and others' experiences) where you come out to a person who themselves has been out a few years already. How do the dynamics of the relationship alter etc.... I also find the feeling of solidarity when coming out to an LGBT person to be interesting.
Congratulations on taking that monumental step! I know what you mean about getting those words out of your own mouth; while not in-person, I recently came out to a few friends via email and it took me a whole day to push that "send" button.