Hi from a newbie

Just wanted to say welcome to you, dreamsandwishes. This has been a really wonderful forum for me. I don't post too often and usually when I do it is because I need to vent about something. I have received wonderful advice from others on here and the best thing about EC is how non-judgmental everyone is regarding all of our different situations.

It sounds cliche but everybody's path and needs are different and I think this site will help you figure out whether staying married or talking about it with your husband or something entirely different is the right thing for you. Looking back to my first post from a year ago, I was in a very different mindset then. I like to think things have changed for the better.

Life is short. I have no doubt that others on here can help you and I hope I have something to offer to you as well!

 

Good morning Dreams & Wishes, welcome to EC. It sounds like this forum is a good place for you, I'm sure you'll find much support and insight here. Read around, dig back to older posts and don't hold back from expressing yourself.

It really is a wonderful place and a great source of both comfort and knowledge. Not to mention all the kindred spirits you'll find here - many souls with different experiences on similar journeys.

 

You might have a look at his thread, and similar ones:
http://emptyclosets.com/forum/sexual-romantic-orientation/143948-has-never-happened-before-16.html

And I'd say just post, speak your mind and ask if you have questions...

(*hug*)(*hug*)

 

Hi Dreamsandwishes and welcome to EC. You have came to the right place. I'm sorry you weren't welcomed in your support group, but you are definitely welcome here.

 

Hi, welcome to EC.

 

Welcome and enjoy the site.

 

Hiya

I could have written your post, exactly word for word, pretty much. Welcome to EC. I too have had ongoing long term problems with depression and anxiety and it's only really now that I am realising why. This is a very safe space to explore how you are feeling, ask questions and find answers. Xxx

 

Welcome Dreamsandwishes!!
OMG! I could have written your post too! You have certainly found a home where there are so many of us in the same situation.
I am finding the same lack of acceptance by other gay women because I am married but I am not ready to just walk away from a good marriage, after all these years, just because of this fact. My husband is my best friend, has been so supportive and understanding. We have 3 adult children, that think he walks on water and would have a very hard time accepting any reason that I would leave their father, let alone because I have realized I'm gay at this geriatric stage of my life I need time to sort it all out, get to know and understand myself. There is no longer any question in my mind that I am lesbian but it's just so complicated.
My question is…if there are so many of us here on EC that are in the same situation then where the hell are they outside of cyberspace?
I am not looking for another relationship with a woman. The first one nearly killed me when she ended the romance and since I'm not a cat, I'm not sure I can spare another life but it would be heaven, to sit and talk with other women that are going through the same crazy, roller coaster feelings that I am!
Oh and come to think of it ( a lightbulb just went on ) my " trigger crush" ended the relationship because it was destroying her marriage, she broke all ties and communication, left me devastated, so maybe that's why other members of the gay community are afraid to get involved with married women? Ya think? :dry:

 

Welcome to the EC, lots of us here in a similar situation. I've found the EC a fantastic place to come and talk and find out who I am. Looking forward to talking to you.

 

Where are all the other married just realized I am gay people? Hiding. Thats why we are on here. There may be one sitting next to you on the bus during your morning commute. I have had these feelings for two years and only my trigger crush, mom, bff and now my therapist know.
My town used to have a group just for people like us at our LGBT center. But I guess it just became more like a place to meet and hook up with other married might be gay people and they would leave to go have sex. The folks running it decided to shut it down because they felt like some weird form of pimp. The lady I talked to said it was making a few really looking for help uncomfortable. They are hoping to start it back up but with a few more rules. Heres to hoping.

 

Here's to hoping DancingGirl! If they start it up I might come…it's not that far from
North Carolina to Michigan :icon_wink

 

Lol they did start one just for the men. No women allowed. I actually contacted her again today. She said there is a possibility of a group starting at our YWCA. I guess they have been getting some calls asking about it.
I would be so happy to see some gals locally with these thoughts. To reassure you there are three folks at my work who were previously in heterosexual marriages that have came out in the last three years. So they are out there.
Btw welcome to EC Dreamsandwishes. We all have an idea of what you are going through and this is a great bunch of poeple. Just reach out to us. Take care.

 

Welcome to EC Dreamsandwishes. I just read about the same type of group in my community. I have thought about going. Maybe I'll try after a few therapy sessions under my belt.

 

I just wanted to say 'hi' Dreamsandwishes! Kind of a late posting but I thought I'd say hello on your thread. :smilewave

 

My local LGBTQ center runs a bi-weekly support group for "Women Coming Out of Straight Marriage", I found that group as well as many other lesbian focused groups (some social, some support) on meet-up dot com.

Also bears saying that when I'm open with other people, more times than I would have ever expected, they're open with me. Just today I mentioned to our bookkeeper that I met someone on a specific online dating site. She said she was on there too but had never seen me. I was a bit slow on the uptake and pointed out we were looking for different things, that's when she told me she's bi.

Maybe it's where I live, or my subconscious only coming out to people that I sense are safe, but the larger majority of people I've come out to have just come out right back at me. That's the biggest perk of being out, when I opened myself up to the world, the world opened up to me.

 

Yep...a late hello from me as well! I think/hope you'll find us a very nice and helpful lot.

Enjoy your stay...

Oh, and that confidence you say you forgot to pick up?...you'll find it's already in your cart...but it can be pretty hard to spot at times. Just relax and trust that it's there somewhere, and it'll turn up eventually. *hugs*

 

Hello, dreamsandwishes. I'm new here, myself, and the more I post on EC, the more I enjoy it. Coming to terms with same-sex attraction is difficult, but from what I've encountered you've certainly come to the right place.

Best wishes and I hope to see you around the forum.