for Gay/ Bi guys.....

You see someone you find interesting on the other side of the room at a party, or sitting alone in a restaurant...you would like to get to know him, so what do you do?

First off, you need to establish whether the guy you are interested in is gay or bi. If they are in certain gay-friendly venues, that's easy, but why limit yourself to only those who go to these places? Museums, concerts, parties, art courses, etc. are all excellent places to be. So flirting begins with choosing the right venue to maximize your chances. Besides it makes you a more interesting person as well, since you would have done a little research into that museum exhibit which will give you something to talk about when you meet someone.

Next, when you are feeling the butterflies, it is best to have a sure-fire script (sounds tacky but it beats standing there with your mouth open not knowing what to say). The most effective opening line is about being real. If you feel nervous, own it! Try saying something like:

[approach him confidently, chin high, smile, make appropriate eye contact, as if he were the only person in the room] Hi! My name is______. I have to confess, I'm a little nervous about introducing myself to you...but when I saw you I knew if I didn't say something...I'd really regret it.

This approach works for several reasons: When you say 'I have to confess,' you immediately engage someone's attention. When you admit that you're nervous, your openness and vulnerability can endear you to someone. And admitting that you would regret not saying something shows how you seize the moment—you are confident and you take action!

We're also really bad at knowing when someone is flirting with us! If that is the case, notice the eyes, they are looking at you in a certain way...hard to describe, but if you're open to it, you will recognize it.

Don't think this is for you? Reminds me of the joke: A guy asks an old man on the street in New York "How do I get to Carnegie Hall?" the old man answers: "Practice!"

 

Judging by the question this must be new to you. I wouldn't worry too much about flirting with men. With women it was always awkward for me to flirt. With men it was a lot more natural.

There are a lot less head games with two men. Both guys tend to be straightforward. Most men just need brief eye contact and if they are interested they will let you know. However, as mentioned above make sure you are in a friendly place or be sure he is gay before flirting. Just strike up a conversation and it just sort of happens. No games, no cheesy lines. If he says your ass looks good in those jeans, he means it.

 

Mae West had the best intro line ever: "Is that a pistol in your pocket, or are you just glad to see me?"

 

Wow looking for me, it's like you read my mind. I'm really out of practice (been married 36 years)... will be watching this thread for pointers. I do know that smiling can be a good way to flirt. IMHO smiles can be winning as some many men simply don't do it. Hope that makes sense.

 

My recommendation would be to simply talk to people.

When people have to make a conscious/pre-planned effort to flirt, it is usually during a time when it is simply not meant to feel natural. Everyone displays flirtatious behavior when interacting with the people they are attracted to regardless of whether they are aware of it or not. The biggest issue that is experienced across the spectrum of sexuality is people feeling as though pursuing a potential partner is a complicated science. This is evident from all of the discussions surrounding the topic of "how do I know hes gay?" or "how do I get him to like me?" when the parties have hardly exchanged two words with one another.

If you are interested in someone, start a conversation. Not in hopes of having it lead to a future romance, rather simply to discover the type of person they are and gauge whether there is actually any sense of compatibility between you. Don't allow yourself to be overburdened by questions and expectations because the reality is that you still know nearly nothing about them. There is something to be said about reaching out to everyone who you feel inspired to regardless of physical attraction or expectation. If there is a mutual interest after the first contact, things will progress naturally without fail.

 

Yes I would agree with those who say to just start a general conversation. You'll quickly work out how far that conversation can go.

 

A sense of humour is important, I think. People like to laugh, and to be made to laugh. Might spark things up a bit, too.

 

Hi

First meetings can be ackward as honestly a date with a stranger is contrived.

So yes, first meeting can get ackward but if you want to move it forward have a plan B that moves it to a shared experience. Movie, museum, something that removes pressure.

Tom