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Me and my Colo-Rectal Surgeon

Discussion in 'LGBT Later in Life' started by greatwhale, Dec 10, 2014.

  1. greatwhale

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    Greetings,

    I am over 50, which means my risk for colo-rectal cancer increases with every year. So I finally went to see my colo-rectal surgeon. Well, by "my" I don't mean my own colo-rectal surgeon, but this is our third (rather intimate) "date" over the years, so I do have some rights to the possessive term :grin:.

    Anyhoo, she (yes, she, along with the female nurse...I'm cool with that...no really) was there to inspect the non-oral end of my digestive tract; there to explore hemorrhoids and fissures, possible polyps in my sigmoid colon and all the other indignities the later-in-life human anus is subject to :icon_redf.

    After waiting 2 hours after the actual appointment time (yea socialized medicine!) I get to kneel on the chair of humiliation and torture (not so much torture), I get on my knees, lower my everything, bend over and comfortably adjust myself as the chair tilts forward to reveal the glories of my butt-hole to these incredibly dedicated health-care professionals.

    I have heard the speculum used for inspection as akin to having the Chrysler building up one's ass, but actually, it was much better this time around. Instead of the Chrysler building, I had other things my memory could refer to....

    In any case, the thought did occur to me (as I lay there with my bare ass higher than the rest of me) that this would probably be the only time a woman will ever have access to them thar parts where the sun don't shine..:rolle:

    Anyway, this is a PSA of the utmost importance to you later-in-lifers, don't be embarrassed, it's really important to have these things checked out. I have a friend who is suffering from the devastation of rectal cancer and only now, after several months of treatment, including constant chemo and surgeries, she is starting to recover.
     
  2. Choirboy

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    Thanks for the PSA, and one additional note: Because certain conditions can be connected in peculiar ways, you may be at an added risk without even knowing it. I have a genetic condition whose main visible sign is frequent nosebleeds, but a doctor pointed out that one of the 3 variations of it carried a far greater risk of colon cancer--enough of a risk that my health insurance picked up the $3000 tab to run genetic screening to determine if I had that variety. (I don't; mine is the more standard version that resulted in a golfball-sized aneurysm in my lung, which is a scary thing, but much easier to deal with than chemo and cancer surgery.)

    So get checked for the obvious signs of a problem, but also make sure you have a competent GP who knows as much of your history as possible, and is well-versed enough on any condition you might have to be able to point out risks that you may not have known existed. A doctor you can communicate with is a treasure, and one that will allow you to live a longer and happier life. Especially important when you're part of the "later in life" crowd to begin with!
     
  3. Lexington

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    Worst porn title ever. :slight_smile:

    Lex
     
  4. greatwhale

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    C'mon, it has a ring to it, no? :grin:
     
  5. Choirboy

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    Hah. That calls for a rim shot.
     
  6. Benway

    Benway Guest

    Fixed.
     
  7. PatrickUK

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    I don't think these kind of tests are half as bad as we expect them to be. The first time I had a full sexual health test I was as nervous as hell, but it wasn't that bad really and it didn't put me off going again. Health above modesty and all that.
     
  8. OnTheHighway

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    And here I was complaining about my pre physical blood work that I had to do this morning! I got it easy.
     
  9. soulcatcher

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    I found your female proctologist's approach to be forbearing and stale.
     
  10. skiff

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    GW,

    My PCP did not hesitate to dial zero and he knows I am gay. LOL

    I think he is cute anyway. :slight_smile:

    Tom
     
  11. Lexington

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    Well, at least you know what you're in for. :slight_smile:

    Lex
     
  12. Chip

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    I would not be surprised if, somewhere, there is such a porn video already. Medical examination porn is a huge fetish and big seller, apparently.

    And I must say that when I read the thread title, I was sort of expecting a story of romance, not a PSA :slight_smile:
     
  13. nerdbrain

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    Greatwhale, I remember you posted earlier about your concern that your regular doctor did not sufficiently inspect your butthole.

    I hope that need has been, ahem, rectified.
     
  14. Benway

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    Well, sometimes it pays to be anal about these things.
     
  15. greatwhale

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    Indeed, this anal lapse on the part of my GP, has indeed been partially covered, so to speak, as she did not, for the purposes of this underside inspection, peruse the condition of my prostate to any discernible degree...
     
  16. AndyG

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    Greatwhale - Thank you for two things; 1- That was the first laugh I've had in a couple of days and 2- I just turned 50 and am picking up the phone to make my appointment NOW.

    You will be in my thoughts as I bend and spread.

    Lucky you.
     
  17. bingostring

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    No had a camera put " up there" last year on the end of a 4ft long thing and - even though I was terrified beforehand it was fine and dandy and no problem if I had to do it again !!
     
  18. Wildside

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    so is a colonoscopy next? that roto-router snake that works its way up to your throat. Also, I've read that we (gay men who engage in receptive, well you know) also should have pap smears. In some bigger metropolitan areas (Dallas has one) you can find men's clinics that specialize in treatment of gay men. they are attentive to a lot of issues that your family clinic in Podunk, Iowa (or family clinics anywhere for that matter) might not be thinking about (no, make that "are definitely not thinking about!)
     
  19. greatwhale

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    Actually yes!

    This will probably be in January or February. I always wondered what fun it would be to have both a colonoscopy and a gastroscopy at the same time (they could meet in the middle somewhere and send each other greetings :grin:)!
     
  20. Wildside

    Wildside Guest

    for my first colonoscopy, almost ten years ago, they knocked me out for it. they gave me something, then they woke me up and it was done