Hey, I am unsure so I am asking because of my problems not to make you uncomfortable. I was always wondering about lgbt later in life in this way: Is there anybody L/G later in life (35+) who actually didn´t know they prefer look of same sex people (face, body etc.) to that of people of the opposite sex, for example- seeing photos of man-woman couple, in commercials, in the streets? Is it actually possible not fancy people of same sex at all and in mid age find out??? or were you like "i´ve always fancy same sex more but i didnt know it has something to do with orientation"? thx a lot
I didn't know until I fell in love with a girl at the age of 34. I lived a heterosexual life before that, I knew something was wrong, but I really didn't know what... I did admire good looking women, but didn't consider myself attracted to them.
well, the whole "not know" thing is tricky. I don't mean to quibble, but I "didn't know" for years while I was having sex with men. I always saw it as a one time thing, no matter how many times it happened. So I took me into my 50's before I "knew." Denial is a very powerful thing.
when you "didn´t know" what drew you to men (what women could give you)- was it more men´s look or their "brain, mind"? ---------- Post added 1st Jan 2015 at 03:09 PM ---------- it depends on what you mean by "wrong"- maybe lack of emotional bond to man even if u fancy him (?)
it was definitely a physical thing when it came to sex. I only went as far as being friends when it was their mind. the difference with coming out to myself is that now I don't have to keep those two things separate. I can like someone for their mind, become friends, and be attracted to them figuratively. so it's more integrated. before, it was some boys are for show and some are for fun. and women were ONLY for show.
I basically went from having no preference to realizing, "Just a minute! I do have a preference." So, yeah. You can go from not knowing to finally knowing. I truly didn't know I had this preference until I started to really think about things and let myself think about women that way. Then it became clearer. And even though I had next to no interest in men!
I didn't know until 35yo when I started to have feelings for a girl I met online. I seriously had no idea back then, even though I've never felt attracted to men much, but now all I see are women. I've been with my boyfriend from when I was 23yo. I was purely attracted by his personality at first and fell for him in a very demisexual way.
I can see when some men are good looking but never felt like I want to kiss them, touch them, or have sex with them. They don't make me all nervous and excited like women do.
yeah, nervousness and excitement around them, thats my biggest problem, otherwise i feel very straight but that feeling being around some special women confuses it all
I've been with a woman for a year (I'm 41) but I'm still married to a man. It's taken me quite awhile to realize being with a woman is where I want to be. My husband is a great guy, but I want nothing sexual from him. I desire this other woman in ways my husband or any other man never has. At first I thought it was possibly a midlife crisis, but when I truly reflect upon it, I realize there's been signs for years. I've always noticed other women's beauty, I'm only turned on by female porn, fantasizing about other women. I guess I never thought I'd do anything with it until I met this woman. And wow, it's so powerful emotionally and sexually. I'm still terrified of coming out and starting a new life, but it took me a long time to get to this point. A lot of sleepless nights and anti anxiety medication, but some peace now too.
