Well this has been the most difficult, and the most liberating week in my life. I came out to my wife back at the end of September, we have been in counselling since. We have been working through to figure out if we will stay together or separate... well we are separating... and this week was the real start of it all. We told our kids (girls 13 and 14), I have come out to all my friends, my parents, my kids, about 10 people in all... (plus the ones my soon to be ex has told) I am so happy how well everyone has been for me! How supportive and understanding. Its been a truly amazing experience... now don't get me wrong... i don't expect it to be all rainbows and uniorns forever, i know that there will be bumps... I guess i just want you all to know, its not as bad as you might think. its hard as hell, but i see a light at the end of the tunnel... i see happiness for me down the road, i feel free, i feel a weight lifted! Thanks so much for all the support, the threads, the information, everything that this site offers... without you all i don't think i would be where i am... i love you all!(*hug*)
I'm sure as you say it won't be all "rainbows and unicorns", but like you, clovis, I've found people accepting, and I'm realizing more and more that this was the right thing to do. I'm very visible in my small suburban town--I've lived here since I was 10, after all, and I'm....older than 10 :lol:--and I do still have occasional mild anxiety waves when I look at people and wonder if they know yet, or what they're thinking. The dangers of being excessively self-conscious, I guess, especially after being visible to the general public for decades. But it's far outweighed by the freedom of not having to hide myself anymore. Not perpetually checking glances and gestures and phrases is wonderful. Not being mortified if some guy is overly friendly, or worried that I was taken as gay by any guy who ISN'T friendly. It's a wonderful feeling--congratulations!
Wonderful to hear Clovis!!! I really appreciate the follow-ups post coming out. I am the same age as you (married with kids too) but haven't come out yet. Really inspiring to read your update. I am really glad to hear you are so happy!!!
Thank you all... CHOIRBOY, I too am an active community person in a small town (4500 people) and being that active I do worry about the whispers and glances or looks... but I'm ready for it... I can handle it... this one thing is so small compared to the huge transformation I am going through... bring it on!!! lol MAYBGAYGUY, let me know if I can be of any help to you... it was a journey... and its always nice to have a partner in crime to have your back... I would be honoured to be that guy!!!! LOOKING FOR ME, I have had 100% support from everyone that I have told so far... nothing negative at all... I don't know what people are saying behind my back... but I honestly don't care anyway... I have been really lucky... I was quite worried that people might take my wifes side so to speak and think I was an asshole for putting her through this... (now her family has been like that, but I haven't really had any contact with them...I am just hearing that through the grapevine) and I guess I understand their perspective anyway... So once again EC, this is the best place for people in my situation to get support.. and to build friendships... I have made many... and appreciate each and everyone of them....
Sounds like it's been a roller-coaster week for you, but I'm so pleased you are looking at it from a positive position. Sure, there will bumps along the way, but even if you hadn't gone through this process there would still be bumps and a lot of unresolved issues inside. Well done and thanks for sharing with us.