I give up

If you never tell anyone, how do they know you are gay?

The darkest time in one’s mind is always before the sun rises on another day. To feel scared is to feel life, raw and uncontrolled. We feel vulnerable when we do not control our path.

You are overwhelmed, just remember how to eat an elephant; one small bite at a time.

Take a moment for you. You are not alone.

 

Hi,

Tell some they can't and that motivates them. Give others a little encouragement and they keep moving.

I do not know you well enough to know what you need...

All I can say is "keep moving".

 

I completely understand those feelings. I'm there myself. I'm sorry I don't have any advice to give, but maybe it'll help just knowing you're not the only one that has those feelings and thoughts.

 

Hi,

Perhaps it would help if you could articulate more precisely what you are afraid of. As for loneliness, what is it about being alone that you don't like? What do you feel is lacking in your life (articulate this as precisely as you can) at the moment? With whom are you vulnerable? In other words: can you state precisely what situation you are in that is making you vulnerable?

 

I'm with you on this one, I'm sorry to say. It's been like that for me. But as I now have no choice, I find a way to go on, pushing myself out of the closet. I was in a men's group last night and I was talking about how it's been for me since my wife through me out; and one of the guys asked me, "so who do you have to support too??" " I have, hopefully you guys in this group,, my dog Max, and ec." Good luck, hang in there.

 

And we're not a bad group, Arturo, right? I mean sure...it'd be nice to be able to hang out in person with all of you, and give you real hugs when you need them. But be assured (both/all of you) that there are real people behind the words here, and we most certainly *would* give those hugs if we could.

"All" you can get is the insides of our minds/hearts/souls...but isn't that closer to the essence of what you need?

Ginger...I get the fear. But fear and loneliness is absolutely normal *any* time you are trying to shift gears in life (whether because of sexuality, a specific relationship, a move to a new neighborhood, or even a career shift). And there is not one of us on this planet who is not vulnerable, ultimately. As others have said, all we can do is keep on...*any* of us, whether straight or LGBT...we all face challenges that reasonably put us in these positions...and *know* that it will get better, just like it would if you were moving to a new relationship, a new neighborhood, or new career.

And most importantly, lean on us here as much as you need to. If you share more of your thoughts and feelings, we can help you more specifically, beyond simply telling you it's ok to be afraid. *hugs*

 

BiAnnika,

it's a great group. Sometimes, when its's dark and stormy I remember I can log on and not feel so lonely.

Ginger....
I realized over the past couple of years that mental anguish doesn't actually kill you; since times I thought it would. And, as a result of that realization, I decided that I had to act and push myself forward since I have a bit of time left on this planet and I'd rather be happy than sad. This is not yet accomplished; it's a work in progress.I'm not trying to preach. Giving up has been seriously considered on many occasions. My only advice is when you don feel that way, continue to tell people so you're not alone with it.

 

You might read my thread.... Life, Love, Work, and Everything


And here's a nice video for you....
Listen to the words......

[YOUTUBE]BpHMHxRmA8c[/YOUTUBE]

 

Dear Gingerlilli :

You're not alone, I'm also trying my very best to make a positive go at this thing that we call life. Most times, I swear, it just doesn't seem to be working, and I'll crawl into a dark corner and cry my eyes out.


Life is very hard, especially for us gay and lesbians, we just want to make it in life,
and maybe have someone to love. Is that to much to ask ? life will get better after this darned winter goes away.

Jaymegurl

 

Do your friends, family, work colleagues, clubs (your whole circle) know you are gay?

It is a numbers game. The bigger the marketing the better the coverage.

"Boofie Burger" has the best food, maybe on the planet... Whats that, never heard of them? They forgot to advertise. Tis a pity.

 

Ginger,

My wife threw me out of the family home 8 years ago when I admitted my sexuality - my kids wouldn't talk to me and I ended up lodging. I'd never felt such fear, confusion and isolation in my life.
But I believe that when you hit rock bottom, some kind of core survival instinct kicks in and you review your life up to this crisis with crystal clarity. You go from 'I can't' to 'I have to' as you realise you're not here forever.

Ironically my ex-wife and (now adult) kids have said they respect me more for being true to myself, and they're all more tolerant to other lifestyles in general.

 

a day at a time is good. sometimes, we can only take it one moment at a time, and that is good too, when that is all we can do. but don't feel you have to do this all by yourself. get counseling, make friends who understand, find someone whom you can trust to talk to. burdens are lightened when they are shared. (&&&)

 

I know how difficult it can be but the worst thing is to give up. I discovered how important how are every individual is. If you need to talk wall message me

 

I'm feeling the same right now!
Knowing we're not alone is helping though, slowly but surely.
::hugs:*hug*)