Hi, I came out at age 48 and now I am 53. I have met and dated many lesbians as I live in a place that has a large community but haven't found a relationship. Did I wait too late in life? Is there still hope? Anyone out there feel the way I do or have a late in life success story to share. Some times I feel so lonely, it physically hurts.
I feel the same way, I came out to one person at age 47. I don't know what to do, I feel lonely and depressed. I feel as if I have wasted my whole life. I have some good friends and family, but I haven't told them yet. I feel like I'm walking down the railroad tracks and the gay pride locomotive just came barreling down the track and passed me by because I have been to scared to embrace the fact that I'm gay. So with that being said, I still gather any hope I can muster and try to make it through the day. Knowing that there are people like you and me out there trying to cope. There has got to be someone out there for you, just don't give up, take it day by day, and give yourself a break from thinking or dwelling about it sometimes. Thanks for telling your story, you are not alone.
Welcome to EC OutLate :welcome: I came out to my wife just over a week ago at 51. While I could lament about all the wasted time, I realize that I'm a journey of discovery at my own pace. My first 51 years were preparing me to be gay. I fully embrace the idea of being gay. I just came back from the gym for the first time since I came out. Wow, I noticed this really cute blond guy... So I don't think it's too late, but we must seize the day and make the most out of it (!)
I completely understand why you might feel the way you do, and you'll be pleased to know there are many, many people who come out at your age or, often, considerably later. One of my friends did not come out until he was 69. He's 74 now and having the time of his life. Seize the moment and live every day to its fullest. You have plenty of time to find happiness
Thank you Billy the Kid, SiennaFire and Chip. I appreciate the communication and friendship. Billy, I think you and I are currently at the same train station. With the big community here in Denver and most people being outdoorsy....I am a very femme woman with a professional career. If I am 'camping' that means I am running barefoot through the Hilton lobby. I haven't found a group I fit in with, in almost 6 years! I go to every lesbian function I can find but no groups like me.. My dearest friends are all gay men. The lesbians here want to hike, bike, camp, fish and dress like Willie Nelson or like they just came from the gym....and I want to have a spa day and take in the Opera or a Burlesque show. I've heard people say...well you think they'd like a femme, well no. Butches who usually like femmes are hard to find. Most of the gals out here are "sporty". It has been a real bummer to find out how much non-acceptance exists within the "lesbian world". I have to come out every day as people don't see me as a lesbian and the lesbians think Im a sell out because I am most comfortable looking femme. I just cant trade in my heels for rubber flip flops or hiking boots. The other problem I have is only the young women want to date me. My last few short term relationships were 15 to 20 years younger than me. It is fun for a while but then that outdoorsy thing always gets in the way. Where are the 50+ single professional lesbians????? :tears::tears:
I hear you, I kinda have the same problem, but I'm not into the flamboyant type. I have no problem at all with that but it's just not me. We'd probably make a great straight couple, hahaha. Maybe you could take a vacation to another part of the country where they may have a better lesbian scene that may suit you better? Keep searching maybe someday our trains will come in!
I know exactly how you feel. I've been out to myself for nearly 20 years now, but haven't really been out to those I know. I live in a very small town with no visible gay community, and I find that incredibly frustrating. If you find those 50+ single professional lesbians, please tell me where they are. I think we just have to keep trying. It's a given that nothing at all will happen if we stop trying. The best idea I have at the moment is to spend all my spare time this summer making jewelry so I can have a booth at a local art fair in September. I'm hoping the inventory will bring lesbians past/into the booth so I might have an opportunity to meet local(ish) women. It's a lot of work, and there's no guarantee it will pay off, but I'm doing it anyway .
LOL! I guess I ought to wonder why you aren't out here in the Midwest . I just saw the trailer for Amy Schumer's new movie. She says something like "I think anyone who likes sports has a limited intellect." Which made me think of this thread . I guess we'll have to settle for supporting one another electronically.
:lol: I love Amy Schumer! I can't wait to see her new movie! (Of course that requires getting a babysitter or waiting until it comes to a tv near you.)
While I can't sympathize with being 50+, I already feel you on the professional femme dilemma. I'm actually quite the outdoorswoman, but most women don't even take the time to find that out because of the way I dress. At work I'm all dresses & heels, & after work it's just shorter dresses & higher heels. (I'm Romany gypsy/Irish traveler, dressing kinda like a stripper is basically part of my ethnic identity.) For some reason it's apparently not okay to like both women & mani-pedis.
I empathize with you. You're obviously attractive to people, having been able to secure so many dates. You'll find the ONE.
OUTLATE...have you found any one on one chat rooms helpful? Would be nice to talk it out with someone who understands.
I don't have anything concrete to contribute to this thread except to say that it comforted me on some level and made me laugh out loud! So thanks! Also, Amy Schumer fans, have you watched the youtube video about "the last f$#%able day"? It has Julia Louis Dreyfuss, Tiny Fey, and Patricia Arquette in it and it is absolutely hilarious!
