The guy I've been dating told me a couple of weeks ago that he doesn't want a relationship right now and just wants to be friends and see if anything develops later. I haven't seen him since. I last heard from him in an e-mail Monday morning and responded back. I'm thinking I should just wait for him to contact me again, so he doesn't feel so pressured. The waiting to hear from him and see him again is driving me crazy though.
It may be best to take the attitude that this will not go far, unfortunately. I've learned that dating these days is a haphazard thing, and people are generally not inclined to necessarily say the hard things that need to be said regarding whether or not they are interested. Best not to drive yourself crazy (the world is crazy enough without your help). It would be best to just consider this a lost opportunity and focus on finding other people.
I agree with greatwhale on this - best to move on and not drive yourself crazy with false hope that something may materialize here (*hug*). Having said that, it's important to have gay friends. The more difficult question is do you want to remain friends even if you assumed that nothing was going to happen? I'm somewhat reticent in suggesting this because in order for this to work you have to be brutally honest with yourself about the potential outcome.
It is less painful to have friends first then if something develops fine if not fine you have not lost anything and still have a friend.
Maybe the guy wants to be friends first for good reasons-having been hurt in the past or needing time to recover or something like that. It's good to be friends but I also understand that if you have an attraction to a person it can be difficult for you to be friends, especially if that person gets a new romantic partner. So it's a decision you have to make for yourself.
Hi, am brand new here...is it possible to chat/ email with someone about this site. I have a few questions. Thank you, Sunset Lover
Hi Sunset Lover, Welcome to EC :welcome: As a new Regular Member, you can send private messages to Advisors, Experts, Moderators and Administrators to address your questions about the site. If you need more details, please post your question here - Empty Closets Help and Feedback - Empty Closets - A safe online community for gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender people coming out
I do want to try to remain friends, but it is really hard right now. I don't know how I'll feel if he tells me about someone new he's seeing. I know I have to relax and not expect anything more to develop. Then if it does, I can be pleasantly surprised. If not, I won't be stressing about it. ---------- Post added 8th Aug 2015 at 08:19 AM ---------- Thanks to everyone for your comments. They make a lot of sense. He e-mailed me this morning to tell me about his week and ask how I was doing. No mention of getting together for anything though.
