Has anyone moved on from marriage and started a new life with their new partner?

I have been married 8 yrs and we have an amazing 7 y.o. Our marriage was never normal or happy, tho we got along most of the time, we were basically roommates, I never wanted to be sexual or romantic with my husband and I felt guilty for avoiding sex. We went 2 years without sex at one point.

My best friend & I became best friends about a year ago (though we've known each other 3 yrs) and became very close (our stories of marriage match as far as how we felt about being unhappy in marriage and avoiding sex, etc). She has children also. We formed an emotional relationship then one night about 6 months ago it became a complete relationship (physical, emotional, etc). It was amazing and eye opening, for both of us. There was no turning back. We love each other so much, we have not just an amazing physical relationship, we have an amazing bond, and just communicate perfectly. Our favorite thing to do, which we try to do every day for at least a few minutes is to just sit and snuggle and talk. About everything. We have both admitted to each other that this is the very first time we have ever been 100% honest with another person. She is honestly the first person I have ever openly WANTED to snuggle with or make out with. When we sleep in the same bed (which really isn't often) she is the only person I ever actually wanted to share a blanket with. (with my husband and any other male relationships ive never wanted to snuggle and would never share a blanket. And I could go forever without wanting to kiss them (men). I never got what was so great about kissing before her.

Both of our husbands know about us. Both aren't happy with it, but they really don't go out of their way to prevent us from seeing each other and we see each other several days a week. We both know this isn't fair to our husbands, and we have talked about moving in and starting a life together with joint custody of our children, and giving our husbands the chance to move on. But there are a lot of struggles in with that. I want nothing more than that really. I want to be with her. I want to be the person there with her. We are both basically just walking on eggshells in our homes, as to not make the husbands mad and they get mad often. But they don't want us to leave, they want to stay together for the kids and would fight us hard if we did leave. We don't want to put the kids through an ugly custody battle or cause a huge amount of stress on their lives because of our choice. Yet, we want to be together and we want happiness. Yes, we do get to see each other often, but its not the same as actually being together. I am often sad at night because I want to be with her, we want to fall asleep next to each other and wake up next to each other. Yet, our husbands are making it seem we are the worst people in the world for breaking apart two families. Ive gotten quite depressed over past couple months. I am always happy when I am with her but Im just depressed and sad over the whole situation.