Just came out to my best friend, can't believe I did it :)

Sooo....I'm so happy right now

I was chatting on Facebook with my best friend (we know each other since high school). She lives now in another country, and we don't talk so often. Also, in the last years, when I successfully isolated myself from most of my female friends I managed to keep her at distance as well. Though she always returned

Anyway, we were chatting and I wanted to come out to her for a while now, but was really scared. We were talking about some issues she has with a guy, and some other deep spiritual crazy stuff I was obviously pondering again, should I come out or not. I really wanted to, but was so scared, I imagined she won't believe me or something. So I abandoned the idea.

And at one point she sends me a picture of this guy she is in some kind of relationship with and asks me, is it true that he is not so attractive anyway...So yeah, in that moment I said to myself, this is it, I don't want to lie here anymore..

So I told her that I'm not the right person to ask about this subject Of course she asked me why. Then I started freaking out and walked around the subject for like ten minutes, told her I want to tell her something about me, something I realized lately etc, etc. It was so hard to actually tell her. So finally I told her that the reason I can't answer to her question is because I realized that I'm not really attracted to men.
I was so freaked out but her reaction was very cool. She asked me when did I realize it, and so we started a long discussion (still on Fb chat so my thumbs hurt ) and I told her so many things I haven't got the chance to talk about before with anyone really, except here on EC

It was just so liberating. I talked about stuff we would have never talked about. We never really talked about sex and relationships and she is my friend for almost 20 years.

She told me that I will always be her best friend and she wants me to be happy. And this won't change our friendship at all.

At one point she asked me if I'm sure, and that was a bit weird, but she said something that she just wanted to ask me if I'm not making some decisions I will regret and she said that before she understood that this is something on my mind for a very long time.

Anyway, I feel so relieved that I told her. Wow. And happy

---------- Post added 11th Oct 2015 at 03:00 AM ----------

Now I just realized it's already Coming out day here, so cool that I actually came out to her today, without even planning

 

Yeah, it's 3 am here and I can't sleep yet

 

Fortunately she didn't say thay right at the beginning, but still it made me cringe a bit. Felt like I need to prove it or something. Well, it's definitely triggering something in me I'm still not completely comfortable with.

I'm curious, when you had that reaction how did it make you feel?