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New paths

Discussion in 'LGBT Later in Life' started by Viator, Nov 4, 2015.

  1. Viator

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    I have been seriously dating someone for a little over two months now. I am about to take over the lease on a new place on December 1, and we are in discussions about living together. The old me is horrified by this; not for me, but for my kids. I share custody with my estranged wife and they will be living with me weekends, school vacations, etc. The motivating factor for both of us is economic, and it exponentially shortens our commutes. He is a good person, a kind person, and, he adores me, and I him. He is the diametric opposite of my wife; who at this same point in our relationship had already cheated on me with an ex.

    My kids are 7 and 2. I have introduced the topic of same sex couples to my 7 year old a few times, before our separation, and after. My 2 year old is barely forming simple sentences, so, there's that.

    If you had told me a year ago...
     
  2. CapColors

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    Congrats. Why would old you be horrified, though? Because you divorced? Because you're gay?

    The first seems like a necessity, and your kids will grow to understand the second. They'll be alright. Kids just need your love and time. Treat yourself kindly.
     
    #2 CapColors, Nov 4, 2015
    Last edited: Nov 4, 2015
  3. rachael1954

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    It's interesting that he's the opposite of your wife.

    My gf has qualities that match my hubs, and some that are opposite.

    I read on the internet that when we get to a midlife crisis point, we will do a 180 and completely go in the opposite direction. Then, we will either find that it is comfortable there and stay there, or eventually work our way back to a middle ground.

    Maybe you have found that your wife had no redeeming qualities, and that your man is filling all the desires you always had but never had filled before. If that is the case I am very happy for you!!

    As for me I feel sometimes saddened by my gfs similarities to my hubs, because it means if he didn't have certain aspects I would possibly be happy 100% with him. But sometimes I feel validated by her similarities to him, because that means he truly is/was a good companion in many ways, and so is she.

    Not sure yet the outcome but thanks for your update. I don't have kids but I think they would rather be in a loving home than an unhappy one. I wish you the best in this new chapter.