Trying this again: I'll be the first to admit how much I lean on EC to get me through the day. I was pretty sad to see that some threads have been lost (and totally understand EC didn't have a hand in it). I thought others might feel similarly to me and want to "recover" some of the things they've been posting on this thread. If there's something that you were sort of in the middle of sorting through, post it here and we can try to bring back some of those thoughts. For me: you guys were helping me sort through the marriage stuff, my feeling for work guy as well as my general feeling that I really need to be with a woman, even though my husband is being awesome. The last post in that was from Siennafire, I was trying think how to respond to his comment, it got me thinking about what the male attraction really means and introspecting about whether I'm not still in a bit of denial in regards to where I lie on the kinsey scale. And I also had a thread where we were sharing how we're all big balls of emotion. Post whatever you want here, no need to respond to mine, try to recover yours if you want.
If there's a thread you remember, it might be worth doing a Google search to see if they have a cache of any of the missing threads, or if, by some miracle, the Internet Archive happened to scrape EC between Friday and today.
Do you feel like posting a recap of something you were working through? I'm sad to lose the responses from people, especially those I may not have read, but at least we can recover a bit of it here.
Honestly, my memory lasts less than a day. I've been out of memory medication for weeks. So if I said anything... It's long gone by now.
http://webcache.googleusercontent.c.../lgbt-later-life/196674-so-many-feelings.html ---------- Post added 10th Nov 2015 at 08:45 PM ---------- http://webcache.googleusercontent.c.../lgbt-later-life/195272-another-obstacle.html ---------- Post added 10th Nov 2015 at 08:46 PM ---------- http://webcache.googleusercontent.c...lgbt-later-life/196760-wtf-do-i-want-all.html ---------- Post added 10th Nov 2015 at 08:46 PM ---------- http://webcache.googleusercontent.com/search?q=cache:http://emptyclosets.com/forum/lgbt-later-life ---------- Post added 10th Nov 2015 at 08:47 PM ---------- http://webcache.googleusercontent.c...forum/lgbt-later-life/196574-gay-married.html ---------- Post added 10th Nov 2015 at 08:52 PM ---------- http://webcache.googleusercontent.c...forum/lgbt-later-life/196749-new-crushes.html ---------- Post added 10th Nov 2015 at 08:52 PM ---------- http://webcache.googleusercontent.c.../lgbt-later-life/196053-update-capcolors.html ---------- Post added 10th Nov 2015 at 08:53 PM ---------- http://webcache.googleusercontent.c...ife/196667-being-asked-out-married-woman.html ---------- Post added 10th Nov 2015 at 08:54 PM ---------- http://webcache.googleusercontent.c...u-proactively-go-out-anywhere-meet-women.html ---------- Post added 10th Nov 2015 at 08:54 PM ---------- http://webcache.googleusercontent.c...bt-later-life/196605-considering-suicide.html ---------- Post added 10th Nov 2015 at 08:55 PM ---------- http://webcache.googleusercontent.c...ater-life/196736-need-some-encouragement.html ---------- Post added 10th Nov 2015 at 08:55 PM ---------- http://webcache.googleusercontent.c...ater-life/195973-desperation-panic-anger.html ---------- Post added 10th Nov 2015 at 08:57 PM ---------- http://webcache.googleusercontent.c...r-life/195544-what-heck-flirting-exactly.html ---------- Post added 10th Nov 2015 at 08:57 PM ---------- http://webcache.googleusercontent.c...96548-denial-so-long-how-do-i-let-go-act.html ---------- Post added 10th Nov 2015 at 08:58 PM ---------- http://webcache.googleusercontent.c...-gay-women-feels-35%-male-what-does-mean.html ---------- Post added 10th Nov 2015 at 08:58 PM ---------- http://webcache.googleusercontent.c...forum/lgbt-later-life/196607-rough-night.html
http://webcache.googleusercontent.c...-later-life/196468-coming-out-my-sisters.html ---------- Post added 10th Nov 2015 at 09:01 PM ---------- http://webcache.googleusercontent.c...life/196543-being-out-closet-its-amazing.html ---------- Post added 10th Nov 2015 at 09:01 PM ---------- http://webcache.googleusercontent.c...om/forum/lgbt-later-life/196455-hi-there.html ---------- Post added 10th Nov 2015 at 09:02 PM ---------- http://webcache.googleusercontent.c...om/forum/lgbt-later-life/194838-gay-dads.html ---------- Post added 10th Nov 2015 at 09:02 PM ---------- http://webcache.googleusercontent.c.../lgbt-later-life/196559-guilt-confession.html
Post the actual content (copy and paste the text) to these threads, the Google cache won't last long.
Ok I'll do a few at a time in order if what Inamirror posted. LinkBack Thread Tools Old Yesterday, 09:55 AM baristajedi EC Addict Regular Member baristajedi's Avatar Gender: Female Orientation: Semi-lesbian Out Status: Almost fully out! Location: Edinburgh Posts: 398 Join Date: Sep 2015 So many feelings... Does anyone else feel like this whole process just leaves you feeling so many feelings all the time? I can identify some of them. Longing...for connection, comfort. Not necessarily romantic, just like a need to feel connected to people who I can just feel soothed by being around them, people who have shared a similar experience. Attraction, the raging hormones... I never felt like monogamy was so difficult until now, even though my husbsbd I have enormously improved in that area, I just feel like both women and men are so....tempting. And the rest, it just feels like buried pain, shame, insecurity are all just seeping out little by little. I'm finally on the whole in an optimistic, positive place. Although I have no idea yet how I will explore my attraction to women, I at least feel like things are generally falling into place. But there are just so many feelings... Anyone relate? Last edited by baristajedi; Yesterday at 10:02 AM.. baristajedi is online now Old Yesterday, 10:08 AM inamirrordarkly Drama Queer Regular Member inamirrordarkly's Avatar Gender: Female Orientation: So very gay. Yay! Out Status: two people, and an entire private forum Location: trying to break into the tardis Age: 46 Posts: 479 Join Date: Sep 2015 Re: So many feelings... Lol. So much. I'm just feelings right now As hard as this has been sometimes, omg how good it feels when things are going well. It's 4am here and I can't sleep...on a school morning. Argh! But....so hyped. I wouldn't change a thing __________________ Life is a bitch. Pleased to meet you. inamirrordarkly is online now Old Yesterday, 10:19 AM ebda30 Well Known Regular Member Gender: Genderqueer Orientation: Mostly gay Out Status: A few people Location: CA Posts: 208 Join Date: Aug 2015 Re: So many feelings... Yes. Most i cant identify. Sometimes i feel like its throwing my depression and anxiety into these weird spirals...ome days they feel manageable. I dont think im incredibly optimistic about anything involved with it right now. Aside from my ability to count on my husband but even those feelings tend to be coupled with some sort of doubt or fear. ebda30 is offline Old Yesterday, 10:32 AM CameOutSwinging Member Regular Member Gender: Male Orientation: Not straight Out Status: Out to everyone Location: New York City Age: 32 Posts: 93 Join Date: Aug 2015 Re: So many feelings... Dude, I feel like all I am is this ball of emotions that can erupt at any moment. I'm sort of tired of crying at almost every little thing. Of it not taking much to upset me. My wedding day was kind of a good example. When we did our first look, I was crying because of how beautiful my wife looked and how happy I was. Then 20 minutes later she yelled at me and my best man for joking around too much, and it took a pep talk from my groomsmen to get me to stop tearing up out of frustration from that. I swear, sometimes I feel bipolar. Opening these floodgates were a blessing and a curse. CameOutSwinging is offline Old Today, 12:05 AM baristajedi EC Addict Regular Member Threadstarter baristajedi's Avatar Gender: Female Orientation: Semi-lesbian Out Status: Almost fully out! Location: Edinburgh Posts: 398 Join Date: Sep 2015 Re: So many feelings... I am a huge ball of emotions. I guess, Inamirror, you're feeling lots of highs and lows... I'm not feeling a lot of highs to be honest. I'm in a positive less angsty place, like I see various paths that could be good. But I'm feeling moody, lonely and I guess brooding a lot. It's kind of like after a break up, after the most traumatic stage of angst and sadness passed, that part where you start to feel strong, like I can be ok, but you're far from figuring out how to be ok. Ebda, I hope you can figure out a way to feel peace. it sounds like you're struggling right now. Cameoutswinging, I'm glad to see you posting. Glad your wedding day went well. The tears, I can so relate to that. I'm tearing up all the time lately. I feel like I need a really good cry, some kind of release... Last edited by baristajedi; Today at 12:07 AM.. baristajedi is online now Old Today, 06:02 AM greatwhale By the Golden Chariots of Odin! Community Facilitator greatwhale's Avatar Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: Out to pretty much everyone, except at work Location: Montreal Posts: 6,758 Join Date: Feb 2013 Re: So many feelings... This is an occasion to rejoice! Revel in those feelings, be glad, be ecstatic that you can feel all the things you need to feel as this moves forward. Needless to say, but take this as a very good sign! __________________ Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.― Rumi 'Fraternal Order of the Sloths' Older Little Arboreal greatwhale is online now Thread Tools Posting Rules You may not post new threads You may not post replies You may not post attachments You may not edit your posts BB code is On Smilies are On code is On HTML code is Off Trackbacks are On Pingbacks are On Refbacks are On Forum Rules[COLOR="Silver"] [SIZE=1]---------- Post added 10th Nov 2015 at 02:48 AM ----------[/SIZE] [/COLOR]This is hard to do from my phone...[COLOR="Silver"] [SIZE=1]---------- Post added 10th Nov 2015 at 02:50 AM ----------[/SIZE] [/COLOR]I'll try again in a few min, this is hard from my phone
If you have email notifications turned on for subscribed threads, you won't get your own posts but you might still have other people's. I usually delete these emails pretty fast but I've just noticed they're all in my Trash so, baristajedi, if you remember the title of one you want, I might be able to find your post. (Although it won't be the first post of the thread.) No guarantees.
I was able to save most of the suicide thread, which I've reposted in the "are you ok" thread. Thanks to inamirror's links and chips suggestion.
Thanks Really, but that's ok , I think that i can remember the gist of what was posted, and I'm ok with that. ---------- Post added 10th Nov 2015 at 01:12 PM ---------- Thanks for doing that, that's really the most important thread here.
