Anyone else have this problem? I have no clue what it means to want versus to need something with regard to my sexuality. I keep telling myself, "I need a man in my life." But do I, really? Or do I just want sex? Do I need to come out, or is that just something I want now and then?
I think that it has been proven countless times that the things we "need" are not needs. Ie: monks are abstinence and many are very happy. That is not to say that sex wasn't a "need" before for them. If it is dire for your emotional well being or your feeling of happiness or satisfaction with life then it's a need. At least for me haha
This is something I definitely struggle with in terms of my sexuality. Do I need to be with a man? And if not, then surely I can be happy with my wife. The need to me is being happy. Figuring out what will make me happy is the hard part. Or maybe, taking the gamble on what I think will make me happy is.
Sex is a need. Society will keep it behind closed doors, but it's a need. I notice that even on this anonymous board which is about sex that people are still uptight about it. I went drinking with 3 male neighbors and there were some very pretty women there. I will talk to women and socialize with them but I can't have sex with them. I've tried and I just refuse to go through that again. So for me, sex with men is a need because I can't have sex with women. And sex is a need, though you wouldn't die without it.
Agreed, Sex is a human instinct, it is a need. Being true to yourself, thats also a need. How you achieve that is the question. So if being out helps you be true to yourself, then I think thats a need. Having someone meaningful in your life, thats a want, not a need in my mind. Never to be taken for granted!
Oh, that line between wants and needs is a thin one indeed! The confusion arises because we are confounded by the want that comes from a need, so, for example I can say I'm thirsty but there is no easy way to get water, therefore, I want (in the sense of "I don't have") water. However, I may not be very thirsty, it may not be life-threatening dehydration, so, do I really need water at this particular moment? Probably not. To add to the confusion: sometimes we need something we may not particularly want...such as doing chores, homework, a diet, exercise, receiving advice or discipline, etc. The best way out of this is to have the right values, and thinking carefully about what you want vs. what you need...hint: you actually need far less than you think.
