Just some thoughts I thought I could share and get some feedback on. So, I've been fine. Fine with the bi label. Fine with a possible lesbian label. Ever since I wrote that thread about being excited and proud of knowing who I am and feeling pretty gay -- that I could definitely see and enjoy a life with a female, I'm suddenly into the idea of men. Does this happen to people? Okay. Not so much into the idea of "men", but I started The Office on Netflix recently and just die over John Krasinski. He's always been a crush of mine. He's my ideal guy if there ever were one--preppy, nerdy, pretty boy with an awesome sense of humor--and subsequently, he reminds me a lot of my trigger, lol. Looks wise, that is. Like the gorgeous smile and sleepy eyes. She's no lovable, non-game playing Jim Halpern. She's a total dick. Now I'm so into dreaming up a life with some beautiful John Krasinski if they were his character in The Office. I feel like this sounds a little dumb, and even immature, but I'm just confusing myself a little. I know being bi is having the ability to be sexually and emotionally attracted to both genders, but I'm flip flopping so close to acceptance. I don't even know exactly what I'm trying to say... Something along the lines of, how did I go from "I want to date women!!" to "if I worked in an office with someone who was like this guy, I'd be all set." It just seems so close together. Am I backpeddaling? Am I not as lesbian as I think? Cue the :bang:
Uh...you know EVERYONE loves John Krasinski, right? (Or, more to the point, Jim.) He's designed to be the perfect man. It's as diagnostic as liking sugar or air, heh. --- I hope my gentle joking tone came through. Seriously, thinking will drive you cray cray. Just find someone to love, best you can. Go with bi if that's how you feel, then date a chick and see if it turns to lesbian. Or if you DO meet Jim Halpert, then fuck him silly and marry that loveable dork stat for me.
I kind of did the same when I came out. I declared myself as gay, felt absolutely relieved, and then I started to think about being with women. Am I really gay? Am I really never going to find a woman I find attractive? After that, I went through a "possibly bisexual" phase, but that went away when I started to really sink into my sexuality. So yes, this has happened to me. I'm not sure about everyone else, though.
Yep, same here. I still find a woman hot, but not in a way that would lead to sex. It's been a little tough to fully accept that subtlety.
Yes sometimes I see a guy and think 'ooh he is good looking - and then I double check and say 'hang on I was gay 5 minutes ago -- The thing now for me is - I don't want to be with a guy anymore -- I certainly don't want sex with men anymore and I am a gay women -- If this is new ground for you I'd suggest giving yourself time -- I mean we lived yr one way -- patterns can replay -- You'll either come to firmer ground of being a gay women or a bi sexual women -- either way it will be who u are and the truth will be yours
That happened to me too! I had a mad crush on a lesbian but, other than that, have not had any other wild attractions to women. So, I'm thinking, maybe this was a random "thing." Also, we both acknowledged we had a deep spiritual connection so maybe sometimes love just transcends gender. Maybe this was meant to be a learning experience for me. I do know, I was a tomboy growing up and I think I've forced myself to become more "girly." Now I am embracing that wilder, more adventurous side of myself again, which is fun!!! I mean, I have both sides to me, but I never was the most "girly girl."
Yes, very much so. I seem to need to be able to freely admire women but it always feels like if it came down to it, I would not be sure if I'd want sex/relationship/etc. So I don't know what my label is but as long as I am out and anyone close to me accepts my attraction to women and the possibility that I'll have one in my life someday, I guess I am ok with myself.
I know! I said that to myself, "duh you think he's hot and perfect, he was written that way." I have alllwaaaays had a thing for him, though. And if I do find a him, Jim Halpert** style, I will totally screw him and myself silly. And yes. Thank you. I need to shut the questioning, doubtful crap in my head -- which I've really been working on lately. If I have those creeping thoughts, I just kind of let them be, be what it may... now that I'm on the season where Rashida Jones has joined the cast, I'm fancying her as well. WHATEVER. I like a cutie in business casual - that should be my sexuality, FOR REAL. Orientation: Business casual fluid Yeah, I think it's just natural. I think for me, it really just comes down to the person. Bisexuality is really hard to accept, even for a bisexual, I guess. The idea of sex with a male is more comfortable to me at this point, but I imagine that it's mostly because that's all I've ever really been with. If I'd have had the chance, I imagine I would have been all too happy to get in my trigger crush's pants :icon_bigg I like this sentiment. I imagine that is the truth! Yeah. I thought it was a crazy soulmate thing with mine, too. My attraction came on rather suddenly to her, though. Too quick for me to realize if it was a spiritual connection. If it was that in anyway, it was the spirit of, YOU MIGHT BE GAY, trying to come through. I do think sometimes it could have been a one time thing, perhaps it was... I guess only time will tell. I'm happy to hear you're feeling good exploring new parts of yourself! Yeah, I totally understand that, the not being sure but needing people to know in someway that it's a possibility. That's why I'm super happy I told my parent -- I just needed that one person to know. There are still a lot of people in my family that don't know it's a possibility, which makes me nervous, but I feel that they're outside enough that it won't matter until the moment arises. Thank you for your responses I feel so crazy sometimes, and am happy I can be such a damn pancake on here with my thoughts and emotions.
Rashida Jones. SIGH. She would make any chick gay. She's like the perfect poster child for the modern woman. Stunning, Harvard educated, FRECKLES FRECKLES, she's just perfect.
Happens all the timeee! Yesterday I was stressing over the girl ive been seeing and at night I saw an old coworker and i told him I would introduce him to my single girlfriends and he said: id rather stick with you. Are you single? And i turned into mush. And couldnt stop thinking about him the rest of the night. But then I thought of the idea of having sex with him and I dont wanna do that. But would totally makeout with him. So this possibly means I am a biromantic lesbian?
