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Saw my first LGBT therapist

Discussion in 'LGBT Later in Life' started by crazydog15, Jan 28, 2016.

  1. crazydog15

    Regular Member

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    Location:
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    Gender:
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    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
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    So I saw my first LGBT therapist this week, and I feel really good. I don't think I'm going to go back to see this particular therapist again for various reasons, but I personally feel better.

    I think the biggest change I've felt is that I feel more mentally organized, more mentally stable. I feel like I'm not worried about myself as much; I really haven't had any all-consuming thoughts, and that's a good thing. When I walked out of the office, even though I didn't want to return to that therapist, I wanted to tell people who I am close to that I'm gay. I wanted to. Granted, I didn't, but I wanted to. :slight_smile:

    I'm also starting to think about some of the things I've done in the past, like travelling. Not big trips, but any trips anywhere. As it is right now, I have taken trips, even an hour or two away, with the purpose of escaping myself. I've gone places just to try to run away from myself, even though that's not something I can ever really do. But now, I'm actually starting to think of how I can enrich myself if/when I go somewhere. What can I learn? What can I do to help myself grow?

    But, of course, there is another side to things. Even though it's not possible, I'm feeling at least like I really want to go through the relationship milestones that my straight peers have gone through, and on the same timeline, too. It makes me sad to know that I will never get to do things like ask a boy out to homecoming in high school or meet a college sweetheart. My parents already had kids at my age, and not only am I single, but I'm just barely coming to terms with my sexuality in a positive way. Call me old-fashioned, but it fucking sucks.

    I really don't want pity, especially because there are a lot of people who are way ahead of me in the sympathy line. From what I hear, things are improving at least in some places for people younger than me, so that their younger years will be better than mine. Maybe I'm too self-centered.

    Anyway, thought I'd share.
     
  2. looking for me

    Full Member

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    Out to everyone
    Hey Crazydog, big steps. congrats. i do encourage further therapy, i find it helps me in my journey. i should be seeing a sexologist who specializes in gender and orientation issues in the coming weeks.