(I'm a guy.) Before I had a clue I was gay, I constantly wondered why I was not attracted to girls. The "right one" never came along and I never desired to "date girls". I found a teen romance movie at a garage sale for 25 cents (USD) - I bought it. I wanted to see where I got off track in my teen years. The Year My Voice Broke (1987) - IMDb As I watched the movie, learned what a crush was, learned what attraction to girls was, I said to myself, ~"thats funny I never felt that way towards girls but I have for guys. Oh shit!"
I've often had the same memories of my youth. I cannot ever remember feeling anything but friendship towards girls and women. Guys on the other hand I've always found attractive and until last year never allowed myself to accept the fact I was Gay. I read somewhere I can't remember what it was, the writer was talking with people about getting that instant erection. The thing was he didn't get it when girls were involved. It was only about guys that he'd get the instant erection. As I reflect I realized I to did the same thing.
Same for me. I dated girls because they were into me so we went out. I wanted a relationship, just not with them. I wanted sex to be like my other friends in highschool so I went with it. Now that I'm actually with who I'm actually into, I'm WAAAYY more into it
I never found girls attractive in HS, but didn't fret it because I was focused on preparing for college. Denial is a wonderful thing. BTW - You can watch the movie for free if you have an Amazon Prime membership.
Its actually a good movie and I learned a lot. It presses the limits. It's an Australian movie. You see the shame was so complete in me I did not understand the scene where the young fellow lusts for the girl so bad he's on the verge of humping a pillow - you wont see that in an American movie, prudes. As I watched the movie I kept saying to myself, I didn't do that? I cant do that? Why didn't I do that? WTF is going on with me?
hmm. I have to say my experiences were a little different. Not sure if it's a gender expectation difference or maybe like a Kinsey scale difference, but I really liked the idea of being desired. Like I was fairly consistently looking validate myself that way. I always knew attracted to girls, but hadn't explored it as an option. But once I did I realized how much sex is about more than validation...so I guess that was my "oh this and NOT THAT" moment...
I never had a physical crush on any girls growing up, but I definitely had that emotional "I like you, we should date" feeling. You know that feeling you get in fourth grade when you basically know nothing about sex but still sort of know what dating is because of TV and movies? I had that in fourth grade, and continued having it straight through high school. Except by high school, I was full on crushing on guys sexually and fantasizing about them and all of that. Yet I still had the girl who I felt like "I like you, we're friends, we should date." We didn't, she was taken, but that feeling was there and it never, not even remotely, had a sexual attraction underneath of it. I guess that's the way it's always been, really.
I never had crush on guys growing up. I remember hanging out with the girls and they were talking about different guys and their crushes. I just felt odd. Then the girls got all excited if a group of guys were coming over- I just wanted to keep it a girls´party! I remember even making up crushes on guys to fit in and have stories to share.
Hahahaha! :lol::lol:: ---------- Post added 29th Jan 2016 at 01:44 PM ---------- To be clear: I am laughing at calling us Americans prudes. So true.
So that's what I missed during my first adolescence. My second adolescence was way better Great film. Thanks for sharing.
