It's been just a year since I made the decision to walk through a door that I never thought I could. I walked Out of the Closet. It has been a year of discovery, acceptance, love, anxiety, and fear. From the first moment I told a couple that are dear friends I was Gay I had a personal calmness. They showed nothing but love. As I told family and friends it was clear everyone was so caring and accepting. Things were going fine then through an error on my part I created a situation on Facebook where if you didn't know you sort of figured it out that I was Gay. So in order to quell the whisper campaign I put a Coming Out Post on Facebook. The responses made me cry at one point because they were so beautiful. As the year went on I had to remove someone from a league I run. We'll then one of the reasons I never came out started, I started to get Gay Bashed on Facebook, My website, and other places. People saw it and again I had to explain what was going on. It was almost as if I was a horrified 13 year old boy again. Only this time I'm a 52 year old man and decided that I wasn't going to be vicimized by this jerk. I went to the authorities and they are investigating. I'm confident he won't get away with it. It felt odd to do what I did because I've always been on the other side of investigations in my employment. I do believe that because I spent so long in the Closet I'm unable to have a real relationship, I have grown to accept this. That's why I hope the is a day when no kid ever has to think of the Closet as an option. They should live a life of who they are. I know I've rambled, and although I've been away from EC for a while I wouldn't be where I am today of it wasn't for the people here. God Bless you all and Thank You for your support, love, and guidance.
Hi there! So glad that this is going well for you, overall, and that you are not taking any shit any more, but, I will have to take exception to one thing you wrote: There are things we need to accept in life, like your orientations, but there are other things that we really don't have to accept, and that is the idea that we were damaged in some way by the closet, and that this will forever condemn us to loneliness. I am in a loving relationship, finally, after three years of experimentation and learning, I have found someone who I love and respect. I know it seems impossible, I know just how frustrating dating can be, but never, ever, ever give up trying! I wish you all the best this new life has to offer, and it has a LOT to offer!
Thank you Greatwhale, hopefully Mr Right will appear, I just have my doubts I am able to figure it out at this stage of the game.
I am in the same boat - 57 years old. I decided to change my life last November, and went on my first date with a man in January. I have met some very nice and interesting people on-line, and had some extremely pleasant dates. I have started a casual relationship with a patient and caring guy, so I want to tell you: you can figure it out! If I can do it, anyone can. Just be honest with people. And don't let anyone violate your boundaries. There are quality men out there if you look for them.
