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I may have a date soon...

Discussion in 'LGBT Later in Life' started by baristajedi, May 5, 2016.

  1. baristajedi

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    First date with a woman. :icon_bigg Excited, nervous....

    I met her on a dating site. Won't be for a bit because I'm traveling soon. But.... :slight_smile:
     
    #1 baristajedi, May 5, 2016
    Last edited: May 5, 2016
  2. OnTheHighway

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    I hope it does materialize and the timing to the eventual date does not somehow interfere! Curious, is your husband aware of the date (not that it really matters, just more for my curiosity, so understand if you do not want to answer).

    Some up front advice, given its a first date, try and stay away from discussing your current situation. Keep the conversation light, listening to her and telling her about whom you are (rather than the situation your in). Obviously, be yourself, be upbeat and attentive to what she has to say. (this might sound like common sense, but it was stuff I needed to figure out the hard way).

    Very happy for you!!!!!
     
  3. OutofZCloset

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    I agree you never want to go into past relationships/ husbands on the first date. :slight_smile:

    Very excited for you. Good luck.
     
  4. Katchoo

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    Yay! How exciting!
     
  5. CapColors

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    keep us updated!
     
  6. SillyGoose

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    GG WP GL HF well done
     
  7. baristajedi

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    Thanks! :icon_bigg

    We just started messaging, and she seems really cool (nice, funnny, easygoing), and she suggested meeting for a date, but we haven't gotten much farther than that, so I'm cautiously excited. It gives me a big boost of confidence in the dating site world at the very least, she responded to me right away.

    So...I may be opening myself up to some criticism, but no, my husband's not aware just yet. But I want to be up front with him, so I'm hoping that we can get everything sorted in the next week or so. I hope I didn't blow it with her, actually, because I waited a couple of days to respond to her message because I wasn't sure how to deal with the fact that I haven't really sorted it all with my husband.

    I'm glad you gave me advice on (not) talking about my current situation, it's helpful because I'm not really sure how to deal with that general subject. But on the site that I'm using, people are up front about their status, and so she knows I'm married (she's in an open relationship herself). That makes it easier for me, because I prefer being honest, and that covers that up front. But I also want to not focus too much on just coming out, being married, etc. It doesn't have to be a secret, but I'd rather have a good time and keep it light like you said.

    ---------- Post added 5th May 2016 at 01:40 PM ----------

    Thanks OutofZcloset, Katchoo and Silly Goose!! :kiss:

    Cap, I will definitely keep you guys updated! :slight_smile:
     
  8. SiennaFire

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    Thanks for posting this clarification. I agree that it's better to be upfront about our situation in cases where we aren't separated. You saved me a combative exchange with the others who posted contrary suggestions :slight_smile:

    Congratulations on the date :eusa_clap :thewave: :eusa_clap
     
    #8 SiennaFire, May 5, 2016
    Last edited: May 5, 2016
  9. baristajedi

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    Thanks :icon_bigg

    I'm trying my best to be as honest as I can all around... I started looking on the dating site thinking it would be a while before I actually get a response from anyone. So now I'm just hoping to sort it all out with my husband beforehand. I was planning on having these talks with him really soon anyway.
     
    #9 baristajedi, May 5, 2016
    Last edited: May 5, 2016
  10. gryf

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    So happy for you!

    I'm glad you are meeting things honest and having the needed talk with your husband.

    Great luck for both
     
  11. baristajedi

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    Thanks! :kiss: