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Sex dreams

Discussion in 'LGBT Later in Life' started by baristajedi, May 18, 2016.

  1. baristajedi

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    What's everyone's experience on this if you're willing to share? Do your sex dreams tend to line up with your real attractions? Like if you're gay do you tend to dream gay sex dreams or if you're bi , you dream about more than one gender?

    I have always dreamed about women and men, and I don't think it's always indicative of my real sexual feelings.

    Yes this thread was inspired by a sex dream :icon_redf

    But it wasn't very hot, so I won't share it here. I don't mind sharing it, but you are missing nothing by me not sharing. Except maybe a good laugh.
     
    #1 baristajedi, May 18, 2016
    Last edited: May 18, 2016
  2. Lance

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    Yes, from the 3 sex dreams that I can recall that I've had, they involved another guy. Thankfully those dreams are about the only ones I can remember after all these years, lol. :grin:
     
  3. Really

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    Sex dreams?! What sex dreams? I think I'm owed a refund. My welcome package is missing some stuff.
     
  4. baristajedi

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    Really and Lance - Omg I have sex dreams all the time. Am I the only one always dreaming about sex??? Uh oh

    Lance - interesting, so for you it lines up. I only fantasise (since I was super young) about women. But I dream about women and men. I wonder why that is for me. I also realised based on last night's sex dream just how much it matters that someone can make me laugh. If you can make me laugh, you can have me baby.
     
    #4 baristajedi, May 18, 2016
    Last edited: May 18, 2016
  5. YeahpIdk

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    I've never really been one to have serious sex dreams. We can't all be lucky. But I have had a few dreams with sex in them since coming out to myself, and they've tended to reflect my real life confusion and thoughts. I won't go into detail either, because some of them are too much, lol. However, they turn out to be more awkward than hot. I usually don't know what I'm doing, or things are blown out of proportion, especially when it's a dream with a female. They're pretty humorous when I wake up.

    I do remember, and it's weird to me that I still do (probably because of the impact), that I had a sex dream with a woman when I was really young. I want to say just reaching double digits (10 - 12) young. And I woke up all hot and bothered, and then extremely bothered. I was disturbed by it for years after when I thought about it. I wonder what that meant!? Early indications? I wish my dreams were half as good with women now...
     
  6. Domosuke

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    I had a very realistic dream that I was giving a cop a blowjob in his squad car lol.

    Not too long after that, I was at this outdoor music festival in the Angeles National Forest, I went to the parking lot to get something out of my car, I inadvertently walked up to a cop very similar looking to the one in my dream taking a leak. lol.
     
  7. OnTheHighway

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    I have not thought about this for quite some time. But prior to coming out, I had regular sex dreams being with guys. Some of them seemed quite intense and real. Now that you asked the question, and now that I living my life as an out and proud gay man, I actually can not recall the last time I had such a dream.
     
  8. CameOutSwinging

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    The only time I even remotely had a sex dream about a girl was back in fourth grade. And she was just naked and flirting with me. I remember the next day at school, one of my best friends at the time ended up telling me he had a crush on the same girl.

    He's openly gay now. Or so Facebook told me. Hahahaha.

    Anyway, since then it's always been guys. And specifically guys I've been attracted to.
     
  9. Mihael

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    I have no clue, I dream of both, but I dream of women much more than I'm actually attracted to them. I think it must be role compensation, because I'm still figuring out how to make my gender work in this world.
     
  10. fenestra

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    I'd say I dream about sex maybe once or twice a month and almost always about women that I know personally or my partner (the only man I'm attracted to). The dreams about women don't surprise me since I'm almost exclusively homosexually/non-binary fantasized (that's really a word??) I'm kinda surprised I still dream about my partner after 4+ years. Well, not really. I still think I have a crush on him. :icon_redf

    And sex dreams with people usually symbolize there is something about them you admire. It can also mean you wish to create something with them as sex is a creative act. Or, if you're a Freudist, it means you just want to bang them. lol
     
    #10 fenestra, May 19, 2016
    Last edited: May 19, 2016
  11. biAnnika

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    Oh, you are so *absolutely* not the only one! I can't say "all the time", but I certainly have "sex dreams".

    They actually really do line up pretty closely with my sexuality...I am a Kinsey 4, and I'd say somewhere between 75-85% of those dreams are about women.
     
  12. Distant Echo

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    Lol...every night. But about and involving the butch I'm dating. Great dreams and we have fun discussing them
     
  13. Chloe

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    I almost always dream about sex with women, different ones that I usually don't know or don't know "that way". Dreams with sex are probably less than once a month. It's usually very physical, not much plot. I'm primarily attracted to women but live with a man now, so I'm not surprised the dreams have women. I'm not all that attracted to men physically -- with them, it's more for the BDSM, friendship, etc, but the sex can be good -- just not dream material.
     
  14. baristajedi

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    Guys- it seems like I'm unusual in having a crazy amount of sex dreams, and in the players in my dreams. I'm going to have to think about this a little. I didn't realise I was so unusual in this experience.

    ---------- Post added 19th May 2016 at 07:46 AM ----------

    I'm not sure my sex dreams are all exciting, sometimes they involve people that I'm truly puzzled I had a dream about...

    And it's interesting how our reactions differ in our early dream experiences. When I was a kid, fantasising about women, dreaming about them, I did not take this as evidence of not being straight. I think I was a bit dense....

    ---------- Post added 19th May 2016 at 07:48 AM ----------

    That is pretty trippy!!!

    ---------- Post added 19th May 2016 at 07:53 AM ----------

    Interesting, this insight makes me think - maybe I'm having so many of these dreams about women because it's missing in my life. But I also have dreams about men. And I think sometimes it's not about people I really find especially attractive.

    I'll just say it, my dream last night was about Stephen Colbert. :roflmao:

    I mean he's cool, attractive and hilarious, but I'm not crushing on him, so...

    My dreams with women are often *so* intense though. Clearly my sex dreams as a whole are complicated. Not necessarily 1:1 corellation to indicate desire.

    ---------- Post added 19th May 2016 at 07:58 AM ----------

    Interesting. I really thought a lot of us (people in general) just dream about sex, but not necessarily about the gender we're attracted to. I'm honestly surprised.

    ---------- Post added 19th May 2016 at 08:02 AM ----------

    Interesting, that makes a lot of sense, I can imagine that would be a way to work out gender identity.
     
    #14 baristajedi, May 19, 2016
    Last edited: May 19, 2016
  15. baristajedi

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    Yeah I'm thinking some of my sex dreams represent something other than sex. In my case, I'm not sure what. Maybe it's me sorting through my feelings for men and women. I do find men attractive, desirable, etc. I just lean towards women. But honestly I think I'm going through a mind slut phase (I just made up that phrase). I find a lot more people attractive in general than I usually do. Men in certain contexts are so sexy to me. But women, at this point, nearly all women, are catching my eye and I'm just thinking about and noticing women all the time.

    ---------- Post added 19th May 2016 at 08:22 AM ----------


    I'm so glad to hear I'm not the only one with an active sexual dreamlife!

    ---------- Post added 19th May 2016 at 08:24 AM ----------

    It sounds you guys all have very clear, not confusing dream sex lives. So I'm just a bit of a weird one in this area!:lol:
     
    #15 baristajedi, May 19, 2016
    Last edited: May 19, 2016
  16. ConfusedSailor

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    I am so confused too. I am married and have had sex with many women. Bu I have always known I want to be with a man too. Its so hard
     
  17. Katchoo

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    For me, it's not just about the content of the dream but about the emotions associated with the content. Sometimes I'll have dreams about guys, but they're stressful. Sometimes I'll have a dream about ladies at a festival naked, doing all the things, and carrying around royal scepters with vagina sculptures on the ends, wearing earrings that look like Georgia O'Keefe paintings. Those dreams, as you imagine, tend to feel happy, free, and empowering. (!!)
     
  18. OutofZCloset

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    I have had a few sex dreams over the years and they have been about both men and women. The funny thing is when I have a dream about a man it is still about my ex-husband from 20 years ago. I don't have these dreams very often maybe once every few years. As far as dreams with women I have only had sex dreams which include my wife. So at least I can say I'm faithful to her even in my dreams. :slight_smile: Although I guess I'm not going to count my ex-husband because he's a guy. :slight_smile: Every one of my dreams I have been in the submissive role even though I was the more dominant in those relationships.
     
  19. Katchoo

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    Yaaaas! That sounds hilarious and entertaining! Totally going to play video clips of his show as I go to bed tonight!


    Oh, sex dreams not yet mentioned..... I often have masturbation dreams. It's usually pretty good, too, probably because there's no rush, I can try whatever, and it's not like I'm losing sleep by spending time doing it that way.
     
  20. biAnnika

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    Hey dear...I wouldn't obsess over this if I was you. Dreaming about sex can mean as little as the fact that sex and sexual fulfillment (or lack thereof) are very present on your mind these days. Given how much you've been processing your sexuality, this would seem to be completely expectable.