1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.

Ok guys, enough of this sh*t

Discussion in 'LGBT Later in Life' started by baristajedi, Jun 17, 2016.

  1. baristajedi

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Sep 11, 2015
    Messages:
    2,838
    Likes Received:
    828
    Location:
    Edinburgh
    Gender:
    Other
    Gender Pronoun:
    They
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    I'm not going to go into a regret and anxiety spiral, I'm stronger than that. I've been really emotional, but if all of these steps were easy, none of us would have been in the closet to start with....

    I'm clearly going to have some ups and downs. But I'm done with this angst. It's time to keep moving forward.
     
    #1 baristajedi, Jun 17, 2016
    Last edited: Jun 17, 2016
  2. Katchoo

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Mar 22, 2016
    Messages:
    836
    Likes Received:
    7
    Location:
    Georgia, USA
    Gender:
    Genderqueer
    Gender Pronoun:
    They
    Sexual Orientation:
    Other
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    This process is tough. What specifically is going on?
     
  3. baristajedi

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Sep 11, 2015
    Messages:
    2,838
    Likes Received:
    828
    Location:
    Edinburgh
    Gender:
    Other
    Gender Pronoun:
    They
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    Emotional roller coaster.... I'll sum it up -

    Positive happy proud place since April.

    Then the stuff in Orlando -pure heartbreak.

    That lit a fire under me- I made two big statements on FB, one basically stating I'm queer in a larger statement about the attacks, another more focused on my journey and my identity.

    And all sorts of emotions came out of that. Vulnerability, anxiety, and nostalgia. The woman I was in love with just before I got married, she was the first to like my out status. And it made me ...ponder a lot about what I wish things could have been.

    But I can't be angsty. It's not always going to be- take risk, feel good. Sometimes it's going to be - take risk, feel raw and emotional, grow.

    I just have to keep reminding myself of that.
     
    #3 baristajedi, Jun 17, 2016
    Last edited: Jun 17, 2016
  4. Tomás1

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Apr 30, 2016
    Messages:
    382
    Likes Received:
    74
    Location:
    San Francisco
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    Emotions are like weather, the clouds, sometimes sun & sometimes rain … hail.

    But don't forget the deep blue sky behind the weather … our true nature.
     
  5. baristajedi

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Sep 11, 2015
    Messages:
    2,838
    Likes Received:
    828
    Location:
    Edinburgh
    Gender:
    Other
    Gender Pronoun:
    They
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    Yes so true. Thanks for the encouragement, Beingdude. :slight_smile:
     
  6. Katchoo

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Mar 22, 2016
    Messages:
    836
    Likes Received:
    7
    Location:
    Georgia, USA
    Gender:
    Genderqueer
    Gender Pronoun:
    They
    Sexual Orientation:
    Other
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    Ok, thanks. Ive caught most of these peices in your other threads but just wasnt sure if you were referencing that stuff or other mystery thing or both.

    ---------- Post added 17th Jun 2016 at 05:01 AM ----------

    Yeah, I keep wanting to find a deep thing to say, jedi. But, insomnia brain no good at that. Please know that I care.
     
    #6 Katchoo, Jun 17, 2016
    Last edited: Jun 17, 2016
  7. LostInDaydreams

    Moderator Full Member

    Joined:
    May 10, 2016
    Messages:
    4,300
    Likes Received:
    2,096
    Location:
    UK
    Gender:
    Female
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    I'm with you on this! :thumbsup:

    Started my own thread yesterday that was trying to say much the same thing. You're very good at expressing and explain your feelings and emotions. I don't always reply to your posts because I don't feel that I have anything to add to the discussion, but I read most of them, and find them very helpful and insightful.
     
  8. RosePetals76

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Jun 2, 2016
    Messages:
    475
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Illinois
    Gender:
    Female
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    Baristajedi and Notmyname, I think we're all in similar boats. Every time I read your posts, I feel like you're writing my own feelings down for me. I've been on that same emotional roller-coaster lately. Sometimes it feels great, and others I feel lost, alone, and concerned about everything I've done in my past. I'm trying to convince myself that these aren't bad feelings, they're just plain feelings that I have to work through. I've boxed up so much for so long that I need to learn how to feel them, be vulnerable, and cope with that. It's not a bad thing to feel. Right?