I am feeling so incredibly alone right now. Maybe it's seeing so many Pride posts on social media this past week, or maybe I'm tired of only imagining myself dating women instead of actually doing so. I'm in this stuck place of wanting to move forward in my life but being too scared to actually get out there. I'm only out to a handful of people. Of that handful, I came out to a couple of lesbian friends/acquaintances, and while these friends were supportive of my coming out at the time, we haven't really talked since. We are all adults with busy lives, and I completely understand that, but somehow putting myself out there and asking for support has made me feel even more isolated than before I came out. I feel such a strong desire to meet bi and lesbian women, but I don't know where to begin. I keep looking at meetup groups in my area, and I've toyed around with joining online dating, but I always end up being too scared. It's hard enough being an adult and making new friends, let alone dealing with all this on top of it. Any advice?
Hi auri7, I totally understand all of your feelings. And I know how hard it is to find the courage to do these things. But the more you do the easier it becomes. It's those first few tries that are really the most challenging. Once you get out there, you will likely find that the LGBT folks you meet are quite supportive. If I were you, I'd start with my local LGBT centre. I found that environment particularly welcoming for newbies. Everyone there seems to be a little nervous, which might make things awkward st first, but at least makes it clear that you're not the only one feeling the way you do. I posted s thread called LGBT friends also - you may want to take s look at that thread for some ideas on how to find friends. But for the courage aspect - it is simply time, effort, trial and error. Just know that you're not alone in feeling this way. I hope that helps (*hug*)
Auri, I have gone through those same feelings. I felt so alone after I came out. I was accepted by everyone I came put to, yet I don't have any lesbian friends that I feel understand me. (Recently I've spent a little more time with the first woman I dated just as friends, and it's helped some.) I, too, want to meet more lesbians and have friends that get it. Even my friends that are bi or pan don't deem to have some of the feelings I've had with coming out. That might be because they were always out, though.
I feel very isolated myself so I can sympathize. I agree with if there's an LGBT center near you it can be a great resource. (And "imagining dating women" is me too. Gah, it's rough.)
Thanks, everyone. It's always nice to hear I'm not alone with these feelings. I'll look into an LGBT center in my area, and I'll definitely be checking out your LGBT friends thread, baristajedi!
