Does anyone else feel like their entire identity has changed with coming out and finding yourself? I'm really starting to feel like everything I've done has been because I felt I was SUPPOSED to, and not because it felt right. I'm at a point where I'm getting more comfortable in my sexuality, but it's made me rethink evert hung else that wasn't following my heart. I'm in grad school right now to further my career, but I can't focus on it and feel like dropping out. I have a job that I LOVE, like truly love with all my heart. If I go on in school, I fear that I won't like the next step, as I'll be giving up this. I think coming into my true self is making me evalute where else I haven't been true to myself. Now what?
This happened to me too. I had previously planned on going to college, but right now I just feel like opening a pet store or animal shelter or something. I want to have a job I truly love, I don't care about making a lot of money. I will be happy if I have enough to get by and maybe travel a bit every year. I am currently going to an upper secondary school online but I have almost entirely forgotten about it. As in I haven't even been on their website for a month. :redface: I just don't know what I want to do with my life right now. So I ask myself the same question you do: now what? What do I really want out of life? I have read too many articles like this. I feel I am doing a good job at the whole being myself and being happy thing right now, and I don't want to waste over half of the rest of my life working a job I hate. So what now? What do I even want?
I'm struggling with the idea of potentially not being who I thought I was, and having to rewrite the narrative of my life, so I sort of understand. If you do finish grad school and don't like your new job, can you come back to what you're doing now? At times, I wanted to drop out during my postgrad studies. Part of the reason I didn't was because I was worried about what other people would think, and that it would be out of character for me. Also, I wanted to keep going because I'd already invested in it. In hindsight, I'm glad I stuck with it, but I don't feel like I was fully focused on it at the time and I didn't fully experience it. I was just going through the motions of getting the work done. If it's the right choice for you, there's no shame in dropping out. Do you feel you're just doing it because it's what people expect you to do?
Go ahead and finish school, just don't leave your job. If you have a job you love stick with it, but remember also that everything changes in time. If a new boss was to come in that you didn't like, you would have options. I started a new job 2 years ago and 3 months into it my bosses wife passed away suddenly in her sleep. Things haven't gotten better from there, I've got a new boss and a lot less hours. School is hard, but hang in there you can do it. It's alway worth the work, to have the extra security.
