I know labels don't matter, particularly for me because I'm in a long-term relationship, with no intention of coming out for a little while. But I do like labels, and I want to write this down for my own reference too. I don't feel that bisexual is right, as I've never felt any real sexual or physical attraction towards men. I've developed emotional connections, but at the moment, I don't feel I'd want to build another relationship with a man. As for gay/lesbian, I don't feel that I can claim either of those (or that I want to, at the moment). They're too definite for me to be comfortable with them. And I haven't decided what I want/need in my future. However, I can acknowledge that I have an attraction to women, even if I can't fully accept it. So, I'm going with queer (for now), and I'm going to try to get used thinking of myself as queer (hence, this post). I hope it will help me with acceptance. In about 10 minutes or less, I'm going to regret this post...
I noticed your change of orientation on your profile earlier today. Congratulations on the progress! I hope the new label will help you accept yourself more. I also hope I did not offend you earlier in another post where I said you sound gay to me, I realize I should not have done that when you did not even ask for anyone's opinion on it. Everyone comes to their label at their own pace, and no one should try to tell anyone else who they are. So I am really sorry if I did offended you with that! It was a crappy thing of me to do! (*hug*)
Thank you, but congratulate me when I've worked up the courage to talk to my partner about it. No worries. Not offended at all. (*hug*) It's interesting to have an outside perspective anyway.
NotMyName, good job taking steps forward. I agree that people don't have to have a label unless it is something they want. I find dating easier with the lesbian label because it helps women who aren't sure that I've committed to being with women. Also, I felt like I was questioning too much when I tried to say I was bi, it didn't feel right because I've not had the desire to be with a man in several years. And I'm pretty sure when I was with men, it was only because I felt I was supposed to be.
I posted a reply on another thread about labels as well. Myself I don't like them but I fully understand why some people need/want them. Progress is progress and if it makes you happy I'm happy for you. :icon_bigg
Thanks guys. There's part of me that would like be the sort of person that doesn't need/want a label, but I know that's just not me. RosePetals, have you come across many women without a label whilst dating?
I've had a few just say they prefer women, but most will label themselves. I've learned that asking whether they've been with women before is a necessity, since those who haven't tend to like things to move slower than those who have. And it's hard to throw yourself fully into dating someone who isn't sure of their sexuality.
