Hi guys Have been divorced now from ex wife for nearly 4 years and come out as bi sexual about 7 months ago. I am 41 yr old. Want to be loved again and prob by a man but keep thinking it will never happen. Yes I am fat and ugly and very low confidence. Just want to snuggle up with someone in bed (and I don't just mean sex). Is that wrong? Not sure it ever going to happen as not getting anywhere online dating and not confident to do it in real life. Am near to Cardiff if anyone wants to hold my hand Xxx :smilewave
I'm sorry you're struggling with this right now. I feel your pain, though. I'm wishing someone would love me, too. I fall for others easily and get left every time. I'm dating my second woman, and it sounds like she may be walking away, too. (Cancelled date and no return text/call.) *sigh * I just keep hoping the woman I'm meant for is out there looking for me, too.
Jamie1975 ,I have a couple of things I would like to say to you . 1. Please do not say that you are fat and ugly . 2. I am sorry that you are having such a hard time with this issue . I am 42 ,and a large man, I too am trying to figure out what I am doing in my life right now my self esteem is horrible but I would not ever think of my self as fat . Fluffy maybe (LOL) you are not fat good sir you are the right size for you ! Now that we have that out of the way lets move forward and please not label ourselves OK . I know all to well how you feel about being held and supported and not in the sexual way . Yes you deserve to be happy and treated with the up most respect . I am sorry I do not have the answer you are looking for but I can tell you this that I would be glad to be there for you and give you the support you deserve to have .
Hi. RosePetals - sorry things aren't looking too good, maybe it's not as bad as you think, I will be thinking of you xx Polecat - I try not to label myself, society does that enough for me ! I want to stay strong and believe there might be someone out there for me, but find it very hard. Will try to keep my head up. Where are you Polecat ?
It's not wrong to want to be loved again! Who doesn't? As polecat wrote you are not fat and ugly but in case you are not happy with your "fluffiness" - this is what I get from your way to phrase it - you can do something about it. Every journey begins with the first step and as Ryan Bingham said: "The slower we move, the faster we die." (I love the backpack speech, it was so true for me) I know from personal experience how hard this first step can be, but you can make it. This step brings you out into the world where you can meet other human beings and maybe find the right person for you. I can perfectly relate, this (is|was?) me. I hope that you will find the right one for you!
Men who love other men come in all shapes and sizes, so I'm sure there's someone out there with a similar build who wants love as well. If your weight creates a confidence issue for you or limits your dating pool, then hit the gym and start losing those extra pounds. Either way, get out there and take constructive action towards your goal!
Focus on the things you can control. You can't control meeting somebody, but you can control the things that you think about yourself. If you feel that you are overweight, you can change that. If you feel you aren't the most attractive, you can change that (confidence goes a long way with attraction, FYI). Think of those things and focus on them. You never know who you may meet then. While it's different, I'll say a few years ago after my breakup, I was red desperately to make new friends. The one thing I did that had nothing to do with meeting people was take up boxing. In the end, joining that gym gave me a large number of the people I consider friends now. None of the other avenues amounted to anything. So you just never know who you might meet when you're not trying to!
I have lost 4 stone in 14 months but need to lee at least another 6 stone. Yes I know I need to break that into smaller amounts but have lost interest. Never stick to the gym, unless someone near to Cardiff wants to become my gym buddy ? Trying to stay positive, honest I am ! Xxx to you all
Jamie1975, I understand that others label us and it is not right at all . You can keep your chin up I know you can do it !! There is somebody out there that is dying to be with you and treat you like you deserve to be treated and you will treat them the same way . I know that it will be hard but try not to rush things if you can .I too need to loose some extra "fluffiness" but do not like going to the gym I always feel like I am being watched or talked about so I have found a small walking tract in a park near my house and I use that ever chance I get maybe you can do something like that . As far as my user name it is the only name I could think of that was not already taken . It does not reflect anything about me at all. :-/ .
