I was 36 when i came out to friends and family. It was a bad ride but most of all i felt loved by everyone afterwards... After that a started a new job at the police and didnt feel the pressure to come out yet..until now. That ugly feeling that makes you feel trapped, you have to release that pressure by coming out but on the other hand it makes you feel anxious as hell, terrified. It is back... I m also at a point where i m starting to think i might not have kids in the future. This hurts like hell... I feel alone, i feel like a failure not having my life in order and most of my friends have a stable life that i long for and i am scared about the future. I want to date but my self esteem is low because i feel like crap. These issues combined makes me depressed since the last months...one day the pressure of coming out on my job is taking the overhand, the other day i feel so hurt of not having kids...its so entangled, i dont no how to resolve this...... Maybe someone else wants to share his/ her battles in life in order to finally reach a happy life...i need someone to tell me its going to be Allright. I ve come so far but i feel like these hurdles are too much
Hey Jerry, Just read your post and I know exactly what you’re going though. I have come out a bit later in life ( 30 ) and having kids means a lot to me, feel a tremendous pressure to accomplish these things. Can I ask how your planning it? Chris
Confidence & good self esteem r the most important things While 80% of people have kids, obviously fewer gay people do, tho some do. Having kids takes a lot of time, devotion & money. If u don't have them, it's important to inquire within to see what animates in your life force. Rather than regret at no kids, look at what else life brings u.
