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I think I'm (probably) gay

Discussion in 'LGBT Later in Life' started by LostInDaydreams, Aug 16, 2016.

  1. LostInDaydreams

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    I think my preference for women is strong enough to make any attraction I have had towards men negligible, so (right now) I feel that gay/lesbian is probably the most accurate expression of my orientation.

    At the moment, at least, I'm feeling fairly clear headed. I'm not going around in circles, which I hope will last for a little while. :slight_smile: It feels right.

    I think I've been on the verge of drawing this conclusion for a few weeks. I want to keep this fairly short, so put simply; I was thinking over the weekend about my past crushes on guys, and men in general, and I just can't envision myself kissing another man. To be honest, I've never been into kissing (or anything else) with my current partner.

    Anyway, (TMI warning) my partner and I had sex last night, and it's apparent that I'm rapidly running out of time. I've got to get some work done!!
     
  2. LostInDaydreams

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    For anyone who's keeping track; I've changed names, was NotMyName. :slight_smile:
     
  3. baristajedi

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    This is a huge step! And it's such a relief to have a clearer sense of self. How are you feeling about coming to this understanding?


    Btw welcome to the gay side, we have cookies :slight_smile: :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes:ride:

    :thewave:
     
  4. LostInDaydreams

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    Thanks, barista! I love cookies! :icon_bigg

    Better in some ways and worse in others. The next year or so is going to be pretty hard going I guess, which you probably know better than me. :slight_smile: Either way, I don't think my partner and I have a 'forever' relationship anyway, so best get it over with sooner than later. Terrifying!
     
  5. RosePetals76

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    It's amazing how when we decide to allow that gay/lesbian label the attraction we thought we had for aan disappears without that hetero normative cloak. My "one guy" had lost all power over me as soon as I accepted my lesbian label. Not that labels are necessary for all, I just like mine.
     
  6. Landgirl

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    That's exactly what happened to me!
     
  7. LostInDaydreams

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    Thanks for sharing this, RosePetals and Landgirl. :slight_smile: Glad it's not just me.
     
  8. Amapwouldhelp

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    Thanks for sharing. I guess misery loves company- I'm totally at the same place as you with the married sex... not sure I can do it anymore. Last couple of times have been pretty awkward.
     
  9. LostInDaydreams

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    I'm glad I'm not alone, Amapwouldhelp. (*hug*)
     
  10. findingjoy

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    :slight_smile:

    LostInDaydreams,
    I always bump into your posts I can really relate to them ... as a gay male at least :slight_smile:

    I read this::
    and other than a little gender editing, i could have wrote it. but the different genders (I am male you and baristajedi are not) make me think that this isn't a hormone or male thing - it's about accepting ourselves.


    I also read all your posts about being apprehensive about it... honestly I don't want to be gay.... but on the other hand if the fantasy is anything like it would really be than it's who I am .
     
  11. I'm gay

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    In my 47 year life so far, I've spent far too long thinking that I don't want to be gay. The bitter feeling of unfairness was extremely strong in my 13 and 14-year old mind and I believe I carried those feelings into the closet with me.

    I started to come out only after I reached complete acceptance within myself in being gay. Acceptance for me means that I acknowledge that I'm gay, and I'm at peace in my heart that I'm a good person - who happens to be gay. If you can separate your self respect from your orientation it will go a long way towards inner peace. At least it did for me. That doesn't mean that I'm not scared as I continue my coming out, but I know I'm going to do it despite my fears. Each coming out to another person just adds to my self respect, no matter their reaction.
     
  12. LostInDaydreams

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    Thank you for your replies. :slight_smile: They're really helpful.

    findingjoy, I find that I can relate to your posts too.