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Coming out while in a straight relationship?

Discussion in 'LGBT Later in Life' started by ebda30, Sep 7, 2016.

  1. ebda30

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Aug 29, 2015
    Messages:
    198
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    Location:
    CA
    Gender:
    Genderqueer
    Out Status:
    A few people
    This is something I've been mulling over A LOT. As I feel like a lot of times I have to hide myself when people talk etc. my only friend who knew me and what I was moved in June, didn't realize how much it affected me until I started noticing my "opening up" was closing back off with her being gone. Her, my husband (who knows and is supportive) and my lesbian friend were my main social life and it felt so good but I feel myself slipping back in but come back to, how can I come out while in a straight relationship that won't end?

    I recently got a tattoo on my elf that mad E a lot of people ask questions. Had. A family member message me privately saying it was "interesting" I would get sucha tattoo, I asked why, she said it was because I was straight. I told her, what made her think that? And that *I* found it interesting that she would assume my sexuality is straight considering all her girlfriends m/wife have been previously married to men. She kind of let it go after that. But it kind of furthered the is have no right to come out when I'm living a straight life, especially considering I would have to over and over, but sometimes hiding it or withholding it just kind of feels...like I'm lying? Like I'm doing something wrong? But I don't feel like the other side is right either.

    I know why I'm not with my husband people assume I'm a lesbian. My best friend and J got mistaken for a lesbian couple all the time.

    I just don't know and these are waters I am unsure of. I would like to feel comfortable, and be comfortable but at the same time feel like I have no right when I'm (while not intentially) hiding in a straight relationship. I wish I had a wife. I feel like my chest is caving in every time I think of holding a woman or making a life with one. I'm not very emotional but that gets me, so badly Idont know how to handle it.


    What to do....I just don't know.