As much as I know our friendship will never go to the level I would want, expect on occasion when she is drunk, I miss her and I hate this feeling. Why can't I let her go? After all, she said it is all fun and adventure for her when I have fallen for her. Deciding to sober up (with an occasional social drink) has been the best thing that I have done. . . but, yeah, I miss her and I just had to write it down before I feel like I am going to go crazy.
Hi MF, Don't have much by way of explanation or anything just can say I understand completely. I fell in love with my BF at a young age and continued to have a friendship with her (toxic) for a total of twenty years. We were never physically intimate but the entire relationship was a great big web of manipulation, push and pull, TORTURE. we haven't spoken for three years. Things ended badly. My heart misses her every day. It's an ache I have learned to accept. Not welcome but accept. Time and distance makes it easier a bit. Continuing to be friends with her won't make it easier it will just break your heart over and over again each time. Distance yourself to protect yourself. You may always miss her...but the good news is there are a lot of wonderful women out there who will be in the same plane as you and want the same things. They will treasure you like you deserved to be treasured and your interactions will not only be fun, but full of intent and love and passion. She was a light for you once and may still be, but use that light to light the way to lead you forward to another beginning dont let it blind you and prevent you from seeing tomorrow. Good luck
Beautifully said, thirdtimecharm! Ditto what she said. This missing is the hardest part. From what I've seen on this forum, there are quite a few of us who have had to cut the cord and are dealing with heartache. I'm struggling every day and hope that I will see the light soon. I deserve more than what J has to offer me. So much more. We're here for you!
You summed it up Thirdcharm.. It seems impossible to vacate that spot within your heart taken by someone who has impacted you so much. With time it will be swept up and free.. (*hug*)
Thank you all <3 this is why I love this site, wonderful support. Thank you thirdtimecharm, I am feeling so much better today. I really do hope I will be able to meet a woman who accepts me for me and willing to be a good companion.
MF, Glad your feeing better. Some days are harder than others...and that's ok. I miss K like crazy sometimes and the fact that i have access to FB and she hasn't blocked me...damn will power...allows me to torture myself a bit sometimes. But then (after I sniffle to myself a bit) and maybe kiss a picture or two of hers (Lol, kidding-maybe???) I block her myself. It works for a few weeks....sometimes I just need a peek. There's others out there, believe me. I found another woman. She's AMAZING! Totally met her by chance, but she has now become my light and is giving and loving and returns love with a pure and honest heart. Being with her is a blessing and truly makes me happy. Never give up! Things happen for a reason. Be patient Here if you ever want to talk