So the other day I went for my annual OB-GYN visit. I had not told my doctor all that was happening in my life. I felt it was time to share- now I do not have trust issues- just timing issues. In the process of telling her (Dr.)- I began to cry and felt anxiety that was sometimes hard to talk through. I have told at least 15 people in my life- who are important- including my parents. I am working on co-dependency issues- one of them is seeking validation by making sure other's needs are met- and they are happy with me. I recognized that what I was feeling with the anxiety- was part of this co-dependency. I guess what bothers me the most- is I cannot get through telling my story without crying. Does it ever get easier- to tell-- for the most part I have been living as gay for the last 2 years. Yet when it comes to telling people-- exception my parents-- I am terrified and vary between crying or having a panic attack with anxiety? Anyone else still having trouble telling.-- Is is an age thing (in my 40's)- is it me (which is really is)-- Just looking for some encouragement
It has gotten a little bit easier for me, but I still feel some anxiety, particularly with old friends or people who have known me a long time. But it's gotten a little easier. You are doing fine. Stay strong and be proud. (*hug*)
I think it's scary to tell people for the first time. I don't know if it gets easier as time goes by. I told my mom and most close friends. I'm going to tell more people soon, and I don't know how I'll be. I really care about many of their opinions, so, it may be a little hard.
I don't know whether the tears I have are fear or relief!! But yes, waterworks have happened every time.
