Hi everyone! I'm looking for advice from all of you wonderful ladies who know who to talk to girls!!! I need help! :help: So, I went to a Melissa Ferrick concert recently icon_bigg BE JEALOUS! IT WAS AMAZING! :eusa_danc) and there were lots of girls there of course and, unlike last year, I was actually brave enough to look around and smile at them, and of course I could be pretty sure all of them were gay (which doesn't happen often, right!)...and yet I did not speak to any of them. I am very disappointed in myself! Part of it was that I was so extremely excited to hear Melissa and meet her and everything (I am such a huge fan of her music and I guess I am easily overwhelmed around musicians I look up to, being a musician myself). But still, this was a golden opportunity! These kinds of things don't come around often! And I definitely smiled at several girls who smiled back, and there was a ready-made topic of conversation standing literally five feet away from us, and I said absolutely nothing the whole time. I am a naturally shy, introverted person, so I expected when I started trying to meet someone that it would be hard for me to approach girls at first. I know with coming out to people I was really nervous and so I had to just force myself to do it, and then over time it got easier. Have you all found it to be similar with talking to girls? I am now pretty much always the one to make the first move with online dating. That was really hard in the beginning, but I have gotten used to it now. But I have still never made the first move when I am out with people face-to-face. So, does anyone out there who has learned how to do this have any advice for me? Or would you feel weird if someone just started making conversation with you at a concert? People do, right? I mean if they're both alone and just sitting/standing around next to each other? Also, I don't know if it matters, but I definitely present as more on the femme side.
I was at the point whereby I wouldn't even look at women I was interested in. Still might not BUT went for a few counseling sessions and my counselor was brilliant. He gave advice that wasn't all pie in the sky and laid it out... "So, if you speak to her and she doesn't speak back, how is that any different than not speaking at all?" "What is the worst case scenario?" "Ummm... That she doesn't speak to me?" "Well, you've already succeeded there, haven't you? So, it can only go up..." He made great sense. . I said, "How do you start?" He said "How bout 'Hi'..." Lol - I don't know but I think after a few minutes, you know if someone wants to keep the conversation going. Good luck.
This is something about chicks I may never get used to, but maybe it's okay because I'm usually a conversation starter. Just start conversation. I've gone to concerts and spoken to the people next to me and it wasn't a gay scene. It's fun to talk to people, especially when you're in a place that you've already got something in common. I agree with the above sentiments. You'll know if someone's interested in continuing the conversation.
in my experience, i used to be extremely nervous about approaching girls based on the low levels of confidence i had. i used my friend google to train myself to be more confident and be less introverted. to boost the level of confidence i trained by starting simple conversations with strangers while finding my way up to include girls. learning to talk how to people without having any further intentions with them boost your capability of making the next step... you can boost your level of confidence by finding your self-worth in reassuring yourself based on your achievements and capabilities. seems like a long process but you can also fake it to make it...another approach is using booze to socialise and compliment and if it does not work out...apologise by saying you are so drunk ...lol
