It makes me happy and comfortable to say these words to myself. I don't know if I'll ever be able to say them out loud to anyone else. But for now that's ok, because I am content that I finally was able to let myself in on my own little secret <3. Know what I mean?
I couldn't say the word gay until a month ago....Your not alone!!! It's the hardest thing I've ever done...admitting to myself and starting to accept...I'm harder on my self than anyone! congrats from Minnesota! Dean
Ah yes. Those two words answer alot of questions don't they?!? Give yourself a high 5 and a pat on the back xx
Good for you. Just know that saying it to yourself? That's the hard part... Coming out to others? That's easy. Stand up for YOU some day when you are comfortable to do so. You've managed the hard part...
Well done you. I am similar, might never say to the world i am bi but i love saying it to myself and also to friends online etc.... It definitely feels good to say it.
I do know what you mean. That's a great start on your coming out journey. Take pride in this accomplishment. ride:
Yes, I know what you mean! The first times I said it to myself felt like a huge relief (after years of denying).
Saying it, even if it's just to yourself is a big step, when you start saying it to other people... that's freaky lol. Personally I have just been waiting to get hit on by a woman and see the look on her face when I say it, mainly because I really look Hetero(or what a typical Herero guy around here looks like)
Saying it to yourself seems to be the hardest part! Since finally realizing/accepting it within the last couple of months, I've told my mom, 2/3 of my sisters and a friend. However, I say it like this: "I don't want to ever date a guy." That's not the same as saying "I'm gay" but maybe I'll get there... Good for you!
still feels strange to me. to say those words but it is getting easier as I progress through this stage of my life. for many years i considered myself straight, just really twisted. I guess I always knew it. just never admitted it. im gay. not sure how far out ill come at this stage of my life. but at least im accepting it within myself
you've told the most important person. in time, when you're ready, you will bring others into your "secret" but for now settling this in your own mind/spirit is a comfort I know, BTDT!! (*hug*)
I'd like to suggest to OP, as well as others who posted in this thread, that if you now are able to say to yourself "I'm gay," then I would suggest changing your profile's Orientation appropriately. It might seem unimportant, but just that small change in your profile's status is a step towards to your acceptance. It's a constant reminder to you each time you log in. Each time someone else sees it is an additional inspiration to them. If you find that it scares you to do that, it's ok. Change it for a while and see how it feels, you can always change it back. Give it a try. Cheers! ride:
Admitting the truth to yourself is hard. I've managed to say the words out loud to myself a few times now. Sometimes the truth is overwhelming, sometimes it feels freeing. Imgay47, I just took your advice. I just changed my profile's orientation. I saw it for the first time a moment ago and my heart stopped for a moment. It's my truth though. Thanks for making the suggestion.
Yes, I can totally relate to this. I took about 3 years to come out to myself. Even though I'd realised I was gay I still tried to convince myself I wasn't, and at a friends wedding a guy tried to 'get to know me'. I only kissed him briefly when I realised that then, for sure, I wasn't interested in men, and that was a heavy moment for me. That night at home I thought back to all my past relationships with men and realised that I never was (I was drunk most of the time, and I thought I shouldn't need to be drunk to have a healthy relationship) and then I had a good cry about it but I felt relieved. I felt I was accepting a huge part of myself that had been locked away for so many years. It was another 5 or so years before I said it to anyone else, just recently I told my best friend, but I know what you mean about it being your little secret, there's a warm buzz from having something that only you know and understand about yourself. It's such a huge thing that it's one of those moments you can only understand if you go through it yourself. Well done!
It feels good to acknowledge your true self. Even if it's only acknowledging it to yourself. You are the first person you have to make peace with; once you acknowledge it and make peace with yourself about it, you may find it easier to come out to others. You may not. But it's wonderful you took that step and acknowledged it to yourself. For me it was a relief when I was finally able to come out to myself.
I can totally relate. When I first came here posted I might be gay, someone suggested I go to the mirror and say this. I shrugged my shoulders and thought "ok what's the big deal" I wasn't prepared for the rush of emotions a feeling of warmth and happiness like I never felt. I literally almost buckled to the floor overcome with emotions. It felt great but then I realized I had face what I was denying for years.
