After going through most of my life only acknowledging a heteronormative vantage point, I didn't find very many people attractive. When I would notice attractive people they were women or fem-ish males, but I wouldn't really acknowledge them as a sexual attraction. However, with my newfound acceptance of myself and my more lesbian orientation my world has opened up!!! I see gorgeous women everywhere and they are so beautiful and I find myself smiling a lot . I love this. It is so fun. I am enjoying allowing myself this new and exciting perspective.
Hi Stretching, Aw your post made me smile, that's so nice and I'm so happy for you. I came out to my friend recently and we do check out guys and I know exactly what you mean. Once you accept yourself and allow yourself to be you - it's so liberating.
Yes!! I've found this to be a silver lining to realizing my sexuality later in life. I'm able to see a wider range of beauty, and I find myself appreciating and respecting women far more than I ever did before. I admit that in my past, as a "tomboy" type girl, I looked upon women who were more "femme" with disdain. How shallow they were to spend their time and money looking pretty! Now, I realize how much of that was my ingrained misogyny, and I'm able to see the beauty of all kinds of women. I find myself far more open, far more understanding, and honestly a far better person. When I was denying my attraction toward women, I kept so many pretty girls at a distance because I think I was afraid of showing too much inappropriate interest. Now, I'm able to smile at other women, appreciate both who they are and how they look, and I like the thoughts that run through my head far more. No longer do I feel so critical, so judging. It's more like "hey beautiful, look at how confident you are, how gorgeous, how adeptly you are running your life! get it girl!"
Isn't it great that this new acceptance of yourself has led to you being more accepting of others too. You appreciate the girly girls instead of internally rolling your eyes when you see one. Anything that allows you to see more beauty in the world and to be more accepting of others has to be a good thing. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder - as the old saying goes. So its really up to us to see the beauty and a lot of that is down to allowing ourselves to do that.
I find myself doing this all the time as well, I still get the disapproving looks from guys when they think I've been checking out there girl. Been tempted to give them a wink but in this assbackwards reckneck town, I live in, I may get myself punched out. I've always noticed handsome men before I had my own realization, but as the months go by my gaydar is starting to get pretty finely tuned... and the majority of guys I find attractive are straight I'm sure of it. :bang: It's still nice to have my eyes opened up to even more beauty then I used to see.
I feel the same way a lot of the time. Even with my husband..who now helps me check out women..if you can believe it lol! I see so many amazing ladies around who make me wish I'd never allowed myself to get stuck with a man. Geez I've messed up my life bad...
